As I listened to a few girlfriends chatting about how fun it would be to take off somewhere minus the husbands and the kids...just us girls...I couldn't help but think it sounded more stressful than being at home.

Call me crazy but socializing actually drains me these days.

Here's the thing...I spend a good portion of my day taking care of my kids.

Making them meals, wiping their asses, playing endless games to the point where I can't see straight, keeping them happy and entertained.

They hang on me, they lay on me, they're constantly touching me.  They talk to me for hours on end until their voices all blend together.

Oh, don't get me wrong.  That's probably the best part about parenting...the hugs and kisses, the cuddly moments where they lay with you and allow you to snuggle with them.  And, of course,  hearing their giggles, snorts and laughter.

But what it also means is I'm usually physically and emotionally tapped out come 7:00 on most evenings.   I've already "worked" a full day by the time they go to bed and the last thing I want to do is change out of my comfy clothes and get all dolled up to meet some friends for dinner.

And weekends?

My weekends are usually filled with grocery shopping, running errands and then good old family time.

I'll admit I'm most comfortable when I'm at home.

If I'm fortunate enough to have Tim take the kids to his parents house for a few hours on a Sunday, the only thing I want to do is curl up on my sofa with a cup of tea and get completely lost in a good book.

I don't want to meet a girlfriend to go shopping with, I don't want to have lunch with anyone.  I just want to be alone in my own little world where I can relax...where I feel happy and content...where I can wear a tank top with no bra and a pair of ratty, old boxer shorts.

I have found that I don't crave new friendships as much as I did in my earlier years...you know, before I grew four human beings inside my body, two at a time, and was gutted like a fish to bring them into this world.

Perhaps I'm at my emotional and social limit?  Maybe parenting has filled a void for me where I'm not as lonely as I used to be?

I do have friends...very good friends who I can count on for whatever I need, in good times and in bad.  I have good friends who I know will have my back, who are extremely loyal to a fault.  Those are the friends I would entrust my children to if it became necessary.

That's not to say I'm not open to new friendships; I'm just not actively seeking them out.

The internet, however, is a whole different story.  Because it takes virtually very little effort to connect with another blogger.

I read a blog post which resonates with me, I leave a comment on the blog, the blogger e-mails me and...alas, an online friendship has blossomed.   It doesn't require me to invest hours and hours of shopping, meeting up for coffee or anything else more than what I can provide at this time.

Probably a HUGE downfall but it's all I can manage for the time being.

Things may be different once my children are a little older and become more involved in school activities.  With them being gone all day in school, I may find myself yearning for new friendships.  I may want to step out of my comfort zone and socialize more.

But, for now...I'm pretty comfortable being a social hermit.


As you grow older, how do you feel about making new friends?  Do you prefer a small circle of close friends or a large number of acquaintances?

My lovely friend "Zeemaid" at In the Mommy Trenches recently wrote a post called If...You Are A Better Mom Than Me, which threw me into hysterics.

And then I jumped on the bandwagon and hijacked her comment section with a few of my own.  Finally, I just came right out and asked if she minded if I borrowed her idea!

• If you never check your e-mail while your kids are talking to you...you are a better mom than me.

• If you happily allow your children to help you cook dinner every night without completely losing your shit...you are a better mom than me.

• If your husband comes home from work and lays on the sofa, complaining about how tired he is, while you've been fighting with the kids to do their homework and trying to get dinner ready and you don't fantasize about how great it would feel to smash his head with a frying pan...you are a better mom than me.

• If you never curse in front of your kids...you are a better mom than me.

• If you read your children a bedtime story every single night....you are a better mom than me.

• If you never threaten to shave your children's hair in their sleep next time they wake you up in the middle of the night for something silly....you are a better mom than me.

• If you've never told your kids little white lies, such as "An angel cries every time a child picks his nose"...you are a better mom than me.

• If you never mourn the independence and freedom you enjoyed prior to having children...you are a better mom than me.

• If you make each of your children a different meal every night at dinner because they're extremely picky....you are a better mom than me.

• If you've never set the clock ahead by 30 minutes and then gleefully announced "Oh, look, it's bedtime"....you are a better mom than me.

• If you give your children a bath every evening...you are a better mom than me.

• If you've never tried to convince your child to trespass...you are a better mom than me.

Feel free to add some of your own in the comments....or do your own post (please remember to link to Zeemaid's blog)!

Believe it or not, my house was perfectly clean just two days ago. 

TWO DAYS AGO!

And now…..

 

Sigh….there are simply not enough hours in a day.

One of my favorite things to do with my kids is play board games.

I know, I know...some parents would rather undergo a painful root canal than play a board game with their kids.  Tim, in particular.  He considers them "bored" games and refuses to partake in our twice-a-week ritual. Honestly, I think it's because he's afraid the kids will kick his ass at Monopoly but that's just between me and you guys, okay?

I think spending quality time with your kids playing games is so important.  Not only for the cognitive learning possibilities (counting numbers on a pair of dice, identifying colors, following a sequential pattern, etc) but also for the social opportunities it provides (learning how to wait your turn, good sportsmanship, etc).

One of our absolute favorite games to play is Monopoly (the electronic banking version).  I used to get frustrated having to deal with all the fake money but with the electronic banking version, it makes it really simple for young players.

Every player gets a plastic card (similar to a credit card) and you simply slide the card in the banking device to add money or take money from your account.  Even my 4-year olds know how to operate it.

And I love that they're essentially learning how to handle money.  Like, for instance, they land on a property they were hoping to buy but they don't quite have enough money to buy it.  Or when they owe another player money....they know they have to make good on their loan or there will be consequences.

Great life lessons, right?


Another game we love is Battleship.   Not only do I love the competitiveness of this game but I like that the kids are learning how to plan strategically.  They really have to use their brains in this game, pay attention and try to outsmart their opponent.

They also have to know their letters and numbers in order to identify spots on the board, which has been helpful for the little twins.


Lastly, a perfect game for the little ones (preschool age) is Yahtzee Junior.  Even my big twins love this game.

It's super easy to play...simply roll the dice and try to match up the faces of the characters.

This game teaches kids how to count, recognize matches and good sportsmanship.  Garrett and Landon have even learned how to add up their scores at the end of the game to determine who the winner is.


Those are just a few of our favorites!  We have stacks and stacks of various board and card games that we enjoy.

Board games are such a wonderful way to bring the family together (unless, of course, you have one particular person in the family who is a party pooper....cough, cough...Tim).  

And one of the perks is that all these games are affordable!  There are plenty of ways to save on Hasbro games...right now you can get 35% off!

If you don't already enjoy a family night of board games, why not start?   I can guarantee it's something your kids will love and come to really look forward to!

What games does your family enjoy playing together?

Ah, to be 4 years old again. 

To have your days filled with nothing but excitement and curiosity....silliness and good times. 

No worries in the world, other than hoping you can have chicken nuggets again for lunch (for the 5th day in a row).

Your "homework" consists of practicing your writing skills, while learning number sequence. 


And you know that no matter how many mistakes you might make, your teacher is still going to give you a high-five and a gold star...simply because you applied yourself.

There's no better feeling than when all your hard work pays off, as you finally figure out how to blow bubbles....a skill you've been trying to master for months.





Whipping up a batch of mini-cakes in your sister's Easy-Bake oven is your idea of "really cool fun"...especially because you know you'll get to lick the spoon and the bowl (even though your mother has warned you numerous times about salmonella poisoning). 

Nothing makes you happier than eating the other half of the giant burrito your dad couldn't finish....because you're such a big boy with an endless appetite.



You've got nothing but time on your hands and you have no problem taking a few minutes out of your day to say hello to a friendly cat, even though your mom is nagging you to hurry along.

"Cats need love too," you tell her. 


Throwing leaves in the air makes you giggle until you're doubled over with a bad case of hiccups.

No worries about where the leaves land....you love to scoop them all up into a huge pile and throw them up in the air...over and over again, with boundless energy.


Every open road leads you wherever you want to go.   The options are unlimited.


The world is your oyster, just waiting to be discovered and acted upon.

To be 4 years old again....life just seemed so simple, didn't it?

I often joke with my friends about how awful it would be to be married to a male gynecologist.

I mean, think about it.  After looking at endless vaginas of all shapes and sizes ALL. DAY. LONG. and having to endure in embarrassing conversations about "women issues", does he tell his horny wife, "Sorry, honey, not tonight.  If I have to look at one more vagina, I'm gonna claw my eyeballs out."

Another example.  The car mechanic.  Does he really want to spend his entire weekend fixing his wife's car, after having spent his entire work week repairing everyone else's car?  Probably not.

Tim is the average computer geek.

Sure, he doesn't exactly look like one...you know, the stereotypical introvert who wears his hair greased and parted on the side, glasses always slipping down to the edge of his nose, pens in his shirt pocket and can't hold a decent conversation to save his life because being around people makes his palms all sweaty.

HTML is his language of love, though...which proves he is, in fact, a complete computer geek.  He loves this kind of stuff so I never gave it much thought any time I had a problem with my computer.

Last week, I opened my laptop and saw some weird test was running. 

"What's this?" I asked him.

Complete silence.

"Yo, computer geek.  What's this on my laptop?  It's doing something strange," I repeated.

"Oh, are you talking to me?" he asked.

Bordering on annoyance, I said, "Yes, I'm talking to you.  You are the resident computer expert, aren't you?"

He walked over to my laptop, shrugged his shoulders and then went back to eating his breakfast.

"Well?" I begged.  "Is that normal?"

"I don't know.  Let it finish running the test and then I'll look at it," he explained, nonchalantly.

20 minutes later, the test was still running and I was growing more worried.

"Will you please have a look at my laptop?  Something's not right," I pleaded.

He rolled his eyes and said, "Okay, okay....geez, calm down."

"I can't calm down.  My entire life is on that laptop!"

"Have you been backing everything up like I showed you?  The pictures?  Your book?", he asked.

I mumbled under my breath, "Uh, not exactly."

"Dammit," he shouted.  "I told you to back everything up!  This is the third time this has happened!"

"Well, any time I work on my book, I save it to a flash drive but I kept forgetting to take care of the pictures.  You know, I kept meaning to and then I'd forget," I tried to explain.

He shoved his chair away from the table and sat in front of my laptop.  I watched his fingertips tap endlessly on the keyboard. 

"Shit," he sighed.  "Probably a virus or your hard drive crashed."

With that, he went upstairs. 

"Well," I shouted after him.  "What should I do?"

"Just shut it off when it's done running the test and I'll work on it when I can," he replied.

"But I need my laptop NOW," I pleaded.

"Just use another computer until I can get to it.  Use the one I'm preparing for the demo in Vegas."

Later that day, after he had a chance to look at my poor laptop, Tim said, "I'm going to see if I can recover all your docs and pics off your hard drive.  But I'm getting sick of this always happening.  You HAVE to backup everything.  I tell you this all the time!"

"I guess I figure you can always fix it if there's a problem," I commented.

"I can't always fix it, though.  That's the problem.  You think I can just work magic and fix everything.  Just back everything up from now on and stop putting me through this!"

"But...but....but you're a computer whiz.  You can fix anything.  Friends call and you rush to fix THEIR computers.  My mom and sister always have computer issues and you have no problem helping them.  You're like the super hero of computers!" I offered.

"Whatever," he remarked.

"Don't 'whatever' me!" I complained. "You love this kind of stuff.  What good is being married to a computer geek if I can't take advantage of you!"

Uh-oh...I knew where this was headed.  Me and my big mouth.

"Tell you what," he smiled slyly.  "You can take advantage of me if you let me take advantage of you."

"Well, that's not exactly fair now.  I mean, you fix everyone else's computer with no expectations.  Why not mine too?"

Tim shrugged his shoulders.  "That's the deal.  Take it or leave it."

My laptop now sits naked, without its hard drive, on the kitchen table.

It's being held hostage, basically.  And I'm getting more and more desperate to be reunited with my beloved laptop.

I may have to let Tim take advantage of me so he'll get the damn thing working for me again.

Sigh...

I wonder if our dentist's wife has to put out any time she needs a root canal.

It happened, people.  It FINALLY happened.

I knew eventually my time would come if I could just learn to be a little more patient.

Over the years, I'd listened to friends brag about their experiences and I'd seethe with insane jealousy.  

I'm a good person...how come I was never one of the fortunate ones?  When would it be MY time?

Marcia, Marcia, Marcia....

Well, friends...my time finally came.

I took the kids shopping for new shoes and, the first time ever, I didn't want to run out of the store and throw myself into oncoming traffic.

We went to two different stores.  First, was Payless Shoe Source because I'm cheap and Garrett and Landon go through shoes quicker than Kim Kardashian goes through husbands. 

The store manager measured their feet and, within ten minutes, they each had picked out a pair of shoes that made them squeal with delight.  TEN MINUTES.  That's like a world record when it comes to picky preschoolers finding that exact perfect shoe.

I paid for the shoes and tried not to keel over in shock when both boys shouted, "Thank you for our new shoes, Mommy!"

Okay, who spiked the Kool Aid? 

On our way over to the other store, I couldn't stop gushing about their impressive behavior.

"I was super proud of your behavior in the shoe store.  You all stayed together, you didn't pull endless boxes of shoes off the shelf, you helped each other...there were no tears, no snot, no foul smells randomly emitted.  Seriously, I'm beyond thrilled with how well behaved you guys were!"

They were all smiles...getting along fabulously, singing along to the radio.

WTF?   Was this really happening?  Best not to overanalyze it...

At the second store, Big 5 Sporting Goods, Cole and Bella were excited to buy their first pair of Heelys, which they'd been begging for for what seemed like an eternity.  Finally, I caved and agreed.

They both promptly sat on the floor and began trying on various pairs, while Garrett and Landon sat on the floor next to them and watched.

Let me just repeat that again because it simply merits repeating.

Garrett and Landon sat on the floor next to their older brother and sister, patiently waiting for them to settle on a pair of shoes to purchase.

THIS. NEVER. HAPPENS.  Usually, while I'm helping Cole and Bella, the little twins are tearing through the store, ripping things off of shelves, annoying other customers. 

On the drive home, there was nothing but happy chattering from the kids.  They were sharing gummy worms with one another.  I was hearing tons of "May I please have another gummy worm?" and "thank you's".

From the very back of the minivan, Cole and Bella both shouted, "We love our shoes, Mommy.  Thank you!"

Again, I ask, WTF?

I suddenly felt the urge to find a huge hill covered with green grass, hold hands with my kids and sing at the top of my lungs. 

The hills are alive with the sound of happy children....la, la, la, la

I kept waiting for lightening to strike.  Or John Quinones, the host of Primetime: What Would You Do to appear out of nowhere and say, "Ma'am, we're doing a segment on why some parents go clinically insane after taking their kids shopping for new shoes...."

Upon returning home, they immediately tore into the bags and put on their new shoes...leaving a mess of open, scattered shoeboxes all over the floor.

Not wanting to ruin our happy day, I chose not to complain about them leaving behind a huge mess for me to clean up, as they joyfully sprinted towards the backyard to test out their new shoes.

Beggars can't be choosers, I suppose.  And some battles just aren't worth fighting, especially when I just experienced a major milestone...a wonderful shopping experience with my kids.

As I peeked out the window and witnessed them all chasing one another in the backyard, laughing happily and getting along beautifully, I thought, "This is what I've been waiting for.  This is how I imagined motherhood would be."

My very next thought? 

Where can I get some of that freakin' Kool Aid?