Monday, January 8, 2007

"I'm taking you out of my 5"

This is what Tim said to me yesterday - "I'm taking you out of my 5". That would be his top 5 people in his cellphone network I suppose. I think I'm starting to grate on his nerves. And if that little comment wan't proof enough...2 days ago, as I sulked in a chair feeling sorry for myself, he said "I'm going to ask your OB to admit you to the hospital on bedrest". I laughed...he didn't.

I can't say I blame him for being irritated with me...I learned awhile back that I'm a type A person. I have a need for organization and structure...I like things that are predictable...and if I start a project, I like to finish it within a reasonable time (this doesn't include Cole and Bella's baby books...LOL!!). So it's really hard for me to sit around and watch the dishes pile up in the sink or the endless baskets of laundry sitting all over the living room and not be able to help. And the other thing is I like things to be done a certain way....so when I see him take on the newly assigned task of cooking dinner or getting the kids dressed for the day, I have to grit my teeth and not say a word. A couple times I've caught myself saying "why didn't you put salt in the water for the pasta?" or "why did you dress Bella in that outfit?" and I realize I have no right to even ask these questions. Most husbands wouldn't even be as helpful as he's been while their wives our on bedrest so I just sit back and tell myself "this is only temporary, this is only temporary...so what if the pasta has absolutely no taste....so what if Bella goes to school with a shirt that has old stains on it...so what if the kids didn't get their hair brushed today"....we're functioning, we're surviving....for now, anyway. And the highlight of my day is with the Christmas money my mother-in-law gave me, I asked the lady who cleans my mom's house to come clean our house today. No, I didn't even think for a second of spending that money on the new watch I desperately need or a new bottle of perfume....I just wanted someone to come clean our house. Cole and Bella love to practice their Spanish when they see Margarita, who they usually see at my mom's house when she's there cleaning. They love to chase her around the house, yelling "hola" to her. This morning, Bella decided to call Margerita "Anna" since she can't pronounce Margerita. Margerita didn't seem to mind, saying she's never liked her name anyway. And then poor "Anna" had to tolerate being followed all over the house with Bella yelling "hola, Anna" over and over again. I think "Anna" was happy when Tim left to take them to preschool.

So let's chat more about the kids....Cole has decided he doesn't want to wear diapers anymore. The whole potty-training process has gone in stages....just recently, he started to really dislike being in a poopy diaper and he would tell us immediately that he pooped and wanted a new diaper. It went something like this....he'd go hide in a corner somewhere then he'd walk over to me or Tim and turn his backside towards us so we could check his pants and he'd say "I pooped...I need a new diaper". Then he wanted to sit on the potty AFTER he pooped....okay, this is backwards but at least it's a start and he's showing interest. As of yesterday, he said he's done with diapers and wants pull-ups. I have a feeling it's only because he's tired of Elmo on his diapers and he's more intrigued with the Incredible Hulk and Spiderman who are on the pull-ups that we bought. Bella could care less one way or the other about being potty trained....sure, she thinks it's a neat idea but it's too much effort. She can't be bothered with sitting still on the potty for longer than 1 minute. I asked her the other day if she wanted to read a book while sitting on her potty and she said "yes" and looked at the book for a whole 10 seconds, then said "I'm done" but there was nothing in the potty. They went to preschool today, both wearing pull-ups, and as they were leaving I told each of them "okay, we're done with diapers....you're both gonna use the potty at school like the big kids do" and they both said "okay". I have a feeling the last laugh will be on me but what do I know....I just want them both to be completely potty trained before the babies arrive or we'll surely be driven to the poorhouse from just the cost of having 4 kids in diapers.

My mom and step-dad bought Cole a Bob the Builder tool set, which he thinks is pretty cool. The other day he discovered that the little plastic saw actually works and he was running around sawing at everything. I said "Cole, come here and take the babies out of Mommy". He was happy to oblige...he put the saw to my belly and cut away and said "Out, Babies". It was really cute and I thought for a moment "wouldn't it be really cool if this sparked an interest in him to become an OB???"....but then last night, he took his little plastic pliers and came over to me and proceeded to try to cut my toes off. When I asked him what he was doing, he just laughed....so my dreams of him wanting to be an OB and deliver babies as his profession were quickly fading and I started having some disturbing thoughts of him becoming the next Ted Bundy or Jeffrey Dahmer.

Cole and Bella are really enjoying feeling the babies move and, most recently, they've been able to see my belly move each time the babies kick or punch. The other day, Cole saw my belly move and he said "Mommy, there's a snake in your belly"....which freaked Bella out and she started whining "no snakes, Mommy, no snakes". So now, not only is she freaked about Elmo (thanks to my good friend Tori who had Elmo as a guest at her children's birthday party a whole month ago) but now she's also freaked out the Mommy has snakes in her belly. This child is afraid of her own shadow...but then again, I was like that as a child. I specifically remember my parents buying me this freaky little water toy that when hooked up to the hose, would spurt water all over the place and it would start flying in the air. My sister thought it was the greatest toy on the face of the earth but me....it just plain freaked me out...my dad would bring that thing out on the front lawn and it would send me running for the hills in sheer terror. And it had a freaky, little smiley face on it too, as if it knew it was scary and it would haunt me for the rest of my life. I have a feeling poor Bella will suffer a "Scary Elmo" complex for the rest of her life....she has yet to go one day without mentioning to us how scary Elmo is and how scared she is that Elmo is coming from Sesame Street to come get her.

Well, I'll end on that note....Tim has offered to make me a sandwich for lunch....you'd think I'd be loving this bedrest thing more, right???

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I figure that if the children are alive when my husband gets home at the end of the day, I've done my job.

----Roseanne Barr



 
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