Thursday, April 19, 2007

I've discovered the best diet secret in the world....

.....and it is, have four children, 2 and under....seriously, I'm dropping pounds left and right without any effort at all. I'm eating horribly...a cookie here, a tablespoon of peanut butter there...anything that is quick and easy and can take away the hunger pains for a little while until I can get someone fed, someone diapered, someone dressed or whatever needs to be done at that time. I was finally able to start wearing my pre-pregnancy clothes just this week...yeah!!! And the best thing about it was I haven't made any effort to lose weight...the weather has been yucky so I can't take the babies on walks and eating healthy...well, that just takes too much effort to think about right now so I'm settling for whatever I can reach and grab, eat and swallow within 5-6 bites.

How are things going? Do you REALLY wanna know? Well, I will say that things are a little easier with Garrett and Landon in the sense that we know what we're doing this time around....we're careful not to make the same mistakes we did with Cole and Bella. Sometimes it works, sometimes not but we're not stressing about it. And I think that Garrett and Landon are a lot more relaxed as babies than Cole and Bella were because we're not stressing over every little thing. I actually laugh out loud to myself when I realize that the babies are almost 6 weeks old and we haven't gotten off track with our schedule ONCE...not one time!!!! They still eat every 4 hours and at night, we've been so desperate for sleep that I've stopped setting my alarm to wake them up every 4 hours. At 3:00 am, if they're still asleep, I lay back down and try to catch some more zzzzz's. They usually wake up here and there throughout that time but we're able to get them back to sleep and it doesn't seem to be hunger that wakes them up. We were killing ourselves making sure they were eating every 4 hours at night but we kinda started realizing that the babies were too tired to eat and it was so one night we waited for them to wake up on their own (Landon woke up first and we woke up Garrett) and the feeding went perfectly! They were both hungry and excited to eat....such a far cry for how things had been. During the day I do wake them up every 4 hours no matter what and they eat at the same's working out well so far.

We have a dr's appt tomorrow so I'm anxious to see how much the boys weigh...I can tell Landon is gaining weight, as he feels very heavy to me. He has such pudgy cheeks now. Garrett still feels light as a feather so hopefully he's gaining weight. His hemangiomas are growing and getting puffier, which makes me very nervous, but so far they aren't bleeding and they don't seem to be bothering him so we'll just continue to keep an eye on them for now.

As for Cole and Bella, well, things with them aren't going so smoothly. Their behavior is getting more and more negative....I've been trying my best to let the little things go and spend more quality time with them. Fortunately, though, they are very kind to the babies but they forget they need to be gentle. Bella will give the babies a hug and squeeze their little heads and I have to remind her to be very careful. She loves to help and I had her help me change their diapers the other day....she took one look at their tiny boy parts and said "ooooh, they have pirates too" (she calls "privates" by the word "pirates").

However, I am clearly drowning here....still trying to figure out how to juggle all 4 kids. I don't know how other moms do it. On Monday, I was with the kids at my mom and stepdad's house but I was still feeling very overwhelmed with all 4 kids and that was WITH help!! Tim had a soccer game that night so our babysitter came over for a few hours to help and I was still she left she said she was exhausted!!! And just as I shut the door behind her and started to breathe a sigh of relief to finally have some peace and quiet, Cole and Bella started crying "Mommy, Mommy" and it lasted for 2 hours....I kept running up and down the stairs between them and the babies....and finally I told Cole and Bella they HAD to go to sleep and I was not coming back up the stairs unless one of them was dying...they continued to cry and scream bloody murder. I had forgotten the window was open in the loft and someone knocked on our door, 9:15 at night...and I was sure it was one of my neighbors coming by to make sure I hadn't passed out and left my kids unattended or to make sure I hadn't locked myself in the van in the garage with the engine running after hearing all this crying/screaming coming from our house for 2 whole hours. I didn't answer the door, more out of embarrassment than anything else....

The only thing that got me through that evening was knowing Cole and Bella had preschool the next day....but when Bella woke up, her right eye was all red and puffy and crusty....PINK EYE!!! Is this God's idea of a cruel joke??? Clearly, she couldn't go to school. We had eye drops left over from the last time she had pinkeye and Tim said "let's just send her to school and tell them that she's been treated for 24 hours already" and I said "While I would love to do that, we'd be upset if another parent did that with their child and then our child caught pinkeye so she probably better stay home". And of course Cole didn't want to go to school if Bella wasn't going....when we told him Bella had to stay home because she had pinkeye, he said "well, my eyes are blue".....I think that was the only time I laughed that day. Oh and then he told me that my eyes were black and when I said "no, they're brown", he said "the color of poop"....lovely. He couldn't think of anythign else that was brown in color other than poop....

By 9:00 am, I was ready to kill someone or throw myself into oncoming traffic...Cole and Bella were fighting with each other, the babies were crying....then my sister called "just to say hi" and I told her after the night I had had the night before with the kids and the day that lay ahead at that point, I was ready to go sit in my van in the garage with the engine running....she said "oh, no...don't do that" so I assured her that I was only kidding...I wouldn't really do that...although it did sound like an excellent way to avoid all the chaos....maybe I could just slice my finger "accidentally" with a knife and get to spend the day in the ER....that might sound hellish to some people but it sounded like a VACATION to me! Obviously she sensed the desperation in my voice and said "I can come over and help for a little while".....I practically climbed through the phone to hug her. She left right as they were eating lunch and for some reason the rest of the day went pretty probably had more to do with my attitude than anything else. Things probably weren't that bad to begin with but I had no patience left in me.

Well, as much as I could go on and on writing more, another 4 hours has passed and it's time for the babies to eat....


Michele S said...

Helene- I will tell you how I did it. I was never alone. You need someone in there with you for a few hours a day. I'm sure you can't remember, but the 6 week to 12 week mark, the babies "wake up" from being newborns and all hell breaks lose. Of course, the older ones are pushing your buttons because they feel neglected and they are just downright jealous. You are going to have to put away the guilt on them, and get firm. They are going to push even more because they smell vulnerability. I'm telling you, these kids are like wild animals. They know when you are at your worst and then use all their powers to gain control.

The fact is that they have two brothers now, and this is their new life and now there are four of them and still only one of you. Mine really, really had a hard time with Austin and he was only ONE baby! But mine were younger and still more adaptable. They will come around.

Do you belong to your multiple's club? I would put a call in and get some meals. Is there anyone that would volunteer, like a neighbor or relative or friend, to come over and help you a few hours a week? You need to be able to leave the babies and get out of the house. You really NEED that. If I could change ONE thing, that's what I would have changed.

Don't be afraid to ask for help. People WANT to help you. Send out an SOS call. It is not a sign of weakness. It's a sign of strength to know when you need help. I learned this the hard way. Don't make my mistake.

Do you have any neighborhood girls that might come over for a few dollars and just ENTERTAIN? Their only responsibility would be to get on the floor and PLAY with Cole and Bella. This will go FAR in helping with the attitudes if they feel they are getting attention.

I'm sending you hugs and wishing I could come over there and help you. Maybe I can! How far away are you? I could take a vacation from my kids and come hang out with you!

Jen said...

I agree with Michelle and I only have 2 kids. You have to get help (ok I am volunteering, I will call and we can plan something - nothing fancy). The other thing is you have to be firm with Cole and Bella. If they want something that you can't do right then, then you just tell them it is not an option. Exactly like that, "Sorry, that is not an option right now. This is what I will do..." They can argue all they want, but when they see you won't budge, they will come around. As long as you are feeding them and keeping them safe, you have nothing to feel guilty about. But you do have to be the boss. They may think they are the boss, but they aren't, you are. Stay strong and I will keep in touch.


I figure that if the children are alive when my husband gets home at the end of the day, I've done my job.

----Roseanne Barr

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