Saturday, January 19, 2008

"God is not happy with Daddy, is he?"

I'm in the process of getting pics uploaded so those will be coming shortly...I promise! My favorite thing to do these days is record Cole and Bella's conversations b/c they are hilarious. I have to say I love the stage they're at b/c they are so curious about everything and learning new things every day.

The other day I had them in the car with me as we drove to go pick up Chinese food for dinner. I had the stereo on and a song that I liked came on so I turned the radio up and said to the kids "I like this song". And here's what happened from there...

Me: Oh, I like this song...
Cole: Mommy, is this your song?
Me: My song?
Cole: Yeah, your song? Everyone have a song..
Me: Yes, I suppose you could call this "my" song b/c I like it so much.
Cole: Daddy has a song
Me: He does? What song is that?
Cole: The "oh shit" song...
Me: the WHAT song? (I'm thinking...OMG, did he really just say "shit")????
Cole: It's called "oh shit", that's Daddy's song
Bella: Yeah it's by that lady on the CD
Cole: Yeah that's Daddy's song
Bella: It's a London Bridge song but not like the one we sing at school
Me: London Bridge song?
Bella: Yeah, but it's got a bad word in it, not like the one we sing at school
Cole: Yeah it's the London Bridge song that is Daddy's song, I sing it for you..Oh, shit, oh shit, oh shit
Me: *Now I'm realizing which song they're talking's a song of the Fergie CD we have*...Cole, that's a bad word and I don't like you saying it. Daddy shouldn't be listening to that CD while you guys are in the car. I'll talk to him about that.
Cole: But it's Daddy's song
Me: Well, then Daddy can listen to it when he's alone in the car
Bella: God is not happy with Daddy, is he?
Me: Why?
Bella: Because Daddy's song has a bad word in it and Miss Debbie says that God doesn't be happy when you say bad words
Me: Yes, that's right...but God forgives all the time as long as Daddy doesn't listen to that song around you guys.
Bella: Well, if God doesn't be happy with bad words, then Daddy shouldn't listen to the song ever again...he needs to find a new song that has no bad words in it, I'll tell him later when God's not around

How hilarious is that???!!! I just find the things they say so humorous.

And here's a conversation that happened this morning in my bed at 6:45 am (Tim has been banished to sleeping downstairs on the sofa since he snores like a pig):

Cole: Morning Mommy, lemme get in bed with you and Bella
Me: Guys, it's Saturday...can't you sleep a little later than 6:45 am
Bella: No, no way, Jose
Cole: Hahahahaha, you have to get up (and then he proceeds to bang the back of his head against the headboard and says "ow" every time he does it)
Me: If it hurts, why do you keep doing that?
Bella: You gonna break your head like Humpy Dumpy
Me: You mean, Humpty Dumpty?
Bella: No Humpy Dumpy....that's they guy who broke his head when he fell...he has an egg
Me: You mean, he IS an egg
Bella: No, he can't be an egg..he's just a guy and he has a egg and it broke when he fell
Me: Okay..whatever you say...
**Sometimes we joke with the kids about being 1 of 4, or 2 of 4, in the order they were born when we're so freakin sleep deprived that we can't keep their names straight**
Cole: (to Bella) Hey, you number 2 and I number 1
Bella: You number 1, like pee
Cole: And you number 2, like poop
Me: Where did you guys learn that?
Cole: From Dominic at school...he say number 1 is pee and number 2 is poop.
Me: Lovely....this is what you're learning at school?
Bella: Yeah that's what we's lovely, huh?
Me: I meant that sarcastically
Bella: Sarastically? What's that?
Me: Bella, can we talk about this later, like over breakfast when I'm more awake..
Bella: Sure, what you want for breakfast?
Me: Tell you what, why don't you and Cole drive over to IHOP and get me some pancakes
Bella: I can't do that, I don't know how to drive
Cole: Yeah, we get in trouble
Bella: And I can't have pancakes b/c they make me puke (*she had puked after eating at IHOP with my in-laws last weekend)
Cole: And puke is gross, like when I puked at Red Lobster.
Bella: Yeah, that's gross
Cole: Oh I hear one of the babies....time to get up, get up, now, I said NOW

So you see who's really in charge around here?? The kids...yes, the kids run our house. I often joke with Tim that he's the lucky one to have a job outside the house b/c at least he works for his dad, who's a kind, understanding boss. I always say "well, my bosses are the 4 kids..they decide when I nap, when I wake up, when I eat, when I pee, when I leave the house...they don't let me have any sick days, no vacation days unless they come along, attached to my legs and I've never had a raise since I can remember. Oh and my benefits include being puked on at least 4 times a day, getting poop under my fingernails at least 2 times a day, washing my hands about 20 times a day until they bleed and crack".

Okay, in the time it took me to write all this, Cole and Bella have completely destroyed the family room....awww, yes, just another up the family room 10 times a day....I'll update with pics later....I promise...

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I figure that if the children are alive when my husband gets home at the end of the day, I've done my job.

----Roseanne Barr

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