Saturday, June 28, 2008

I can hear my own thoughts....

and no, it's not because I'm crazy (although I suppose that could be argued)!! The little twins are upstairs napping and Tim took the older twins to a birthday party!! I was originally supposed to take Cole and Bella to the party but I just ran out of energy (the Energizer Mummy can only run for so long) so I said to Tim, "Hey, why don't you take them?" and he hesitated and then said "okay" but I'm sure he was thinking "man, I hope I'm not the only dad at this party".

So I'm sitting here realizing the house is SO quiet that I can actually hear my own thoughts....I didn't realize that when the wind blows just slightly, that it makes a very subtle rattling sound against our front living room window. We've lived in this house for 6 years and I don't think I ever realized that. Or maybe I did, before we had kids, and I've just lost too many brain cells to remember. I also didn't realize that the clock we have above our entertainment center has a very nice tick-tock sound to it.

It's wierd to be on this side of the fence...to actually be enjoying the silence. There was a time that I would cry myself to sleep at night, wishing for the noisy voices of children. I would tell friends who already had children "oh I can't wait until I hear children screaming 'mommy, mommy, mommy' and they are actually screaming for ME". But now that I have 4 little ones who scream "mama, mama, mama" constantly, I can see why my friends craved silence. Even this morning, while taking the kids to Toys R Us (yes, just another one of my crazy adventures...hey, let's take all 4 kids to Toys R Us and empty our bank account), Cole and Bella were in the very back of the mini-van screaming "hey Mommy...." every 5 seconds. After awhile it got so tiring that I finally yelled back to them "I changed my name...I'm no longer Mommy", to which my smart-ass daughter said "are you Helene today?". One key piece of advice would be to NEVER tell your children your actual first name. From that point on, they were in Toys R Us screaming "Hey Helene...." over and over and over and over....

But sometimes I will just look at my kids and think "wow, these are MY kids". Does anyone else ever feel that way? I'll find myself just staring at these 4 little human beings and marveling at each of them and almost still not believing that they are all mine. And I can't help but wonder about what the future holds for each of them...what will they be when they grow up (Bella wants to be Barbie....don't we all?), who will they marry?, how many kids will they have?

But for now, perhaps I should just stay in the moment and relish the silence because it doesn't happen often and thank goodness for that!

5 comments:

Annette Piper said...

hahaha, I so know what you experience! With three children (and only one set of twins!) the peace is palpable when they leave the house to go to school. Mine are older of course, but their favourite word still seems to be "Muuuuuum". I love the silence and the hours of school when I get to be 'me', but aren't children just so precious and yes a complete wonder!!

IAmDenise said...

Helene I knwo you might not think this but I just get a kick out of reading everything you write I get so excited when I see new posts! Never stop! I wish I coule live close to you just to have the kids for a break for you!

Helene said...

Denise, I wish you lived closer too!!!!! I'm glad you enjoy my blog! Kids are always a fun subject to talk about!

Mommie Mayhem said...

I also wonder the same. I thought I was busy with three boys under 5. Quiet time here is when they are sleeping lol ... and by then .. Im ready for bed. The joys of motherhood ;)

Sammi T said...

Growing up in a family with 10 kids there was alot of mum, mum, mum, mum, going on all the time. You would think she would not be able to tune us out,but she could. I used to yearn to hear that sound also.(I was 35 when I had the 1st two) Now its me that can tune out that never ending MOM. You know how it is as a mom, you just know when its a serious 'mom' call.
As for Toys R Us. I used to take them there to play sometimes. Great way to get a feel for Xmas ideas.
Thanks for popping into my blog.

I figure that if the children are alive when my husband gets home at the end of the day, I've done my job.

----Roseanne Barr



 
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