Wednesday, June 4, 2008

I've been jinxed...

So was it just the other day that I posted that Garrett and Landon NEVER fight?! I should've known the minute I hit "publish post", the shit would hit the fan....they've been fighting like cats and dogs within the last few days. And now they're biting each other...and ME!! And the more I try to "discipline" them (how does one discipline a 14 month old child anyway?), they just laugh like little devils and go about their business.

Today, I decided to finally put together a little riding toy my mom and stepdad had gotten them for Christmas (let's just say we're running 7 months behind on everything). So I get the damn riding toy all set up and the fighting began...I ran out back where I knew we had one of Cole and Bella's old riding toys and managed to find it buried amongst Tim's junk pile by the garbage. I brought it in and cleaned it off (total yuck!) and said, in the most excited voice I could manage, "Look guys...Mommy found ANOTHER cool riding toy"....they both looked at me for a minute and then went back to fighting over the new one. Garrett is my screamer....Landon is my biter (although Garrett does bite but his preferred method is to scream as loud and as shrill as he can to get the attention of everyone in the neighborhood to let them know that a serious crime has just been committed against him). Oh and Garrett can throw some pretty mean tantrums now....he'll stomp his feet as hard as he can, ball his hands into tiny fists and scream until his face turns a lovely shade of purple. And then to further emphasize how pissed off he is, he starts banging his head on the nearest thing...today, he fell to the floor and started banging his head on the floor. I would think this would hurt him but it didn't seem to phase him. He was trying to get his point across that he was not happy....okay, point taken...now please stop banging your head against the floor before I'm convinced that you're gonna be brain damaged and have to repeat the 1st grade over and over and over.

I took Cole and Bella to a free trial gymnastics class yesterday afternoon...late afternoon (witching hour), I might add. I had to drag Garrett and Landon with me....and when I say drag, I literally mean drag because all of a sudden they hate their carseats. I'll say "let's go bye bye" and they both run to the garage door all excited but as soon as they see me open the van doors, they start freaking out and running away. Then I have to fight with them to stop wrestling with me and get in their seats....I've even said "fine, then we're not going anywhere until you get in your seat"...and yes I actually waited as if they were gonna completely understand me and get in their seats without any further complications. Cole and Bella just stared at me like I was higher than a kite....THEY don't even get in their carseats just because I threaten them and they CAN understand every word I say.

I finally get everyone in their carseats, which is a 20 minute process, and head over to the gymnastics place. I get the babies loaded up in the stroller and walk in the place and the place was so crowded, there was no way I was gonna be able to even get the stroller in there. And if that's not bad enough, I felt like everyone was staring at me...at first, I just FELT that way but then I realized that yes, everyone was actually staring at me. And even worse, I could hear some people whispering "does she have 2 sets of twins?".....as if having 2 sets of twins was like having a 3rd eye smack in the middle of your face and you had to be discreet in mentioning it to the person sitting next to you. The lady at the front desk said "oh, I don't think you're gonna be able to get that stroller in here"....no shit...so I get the babies out of the stroller and they take off on me and I'm trying to fold the stroller and push it off to the side, all the while Cole and Bella are whining "where's our class? we wanna go do gymnastics". I was sweating...literally sweating...I just knew my face was all red and I really just wanted to walk out of there and never show my face again. And then as I was walking the folded-up stroller off to the corner, I accidentally hit some lady's leg with the stroller and she looked at me as if I was the rudest person on earth. I wanted to scream at her "give me a f*****g break, lady" but I smiled politely and said "I'm so sorry". No freakin sympathy, no "here, let me help you" from one person in that gym....no, they all preferred to stare at me in shock that I would actually attempt such a feat. In the meantime, I have no idea where my 2 toddlers have run off to and at some point during all this, Cole and Bella figured out where their class was and they took off.

I managed to find Garrett and Landon and basically spent the whole 45 minutes of Cole and Bella's class chasing them around, with the exception of the 10 minutes I attempted to put them in the enclosed area which is meant for little ones whose siblings are in gym class. The toys were completely dirty and none of the toys worked....that's not bad enough. Apparently, parents actually LEAVE their children in this tiny enclosed area and go watch their other kids do their class....these other kids were running in and out of the area repeatedly and leaving the gate open at various times, which my little ones saw as a perfect opportunity to escape. After "babysitting" 6 other children, in addition to my own, I said "screw it"....I took Garrett and Landon out of the cage...I mean, enclosed area, and took them over to where Cole and Bella were doing their class and let them run around in a small area. People still staring at me....people still whispering "I think she has 2 sets of twins"....

Of course Cole and Bella loved the class but I felt like crying when Bella said to me "Mommy, I kept screaming at you to watch me but you didn't"....I said "I saw you but you probably didn't see me watching you". I felt like God was gonna shoot me down with lightening right there on the spot....I'm up for the Horrible Mom of the Year Award for the 4th year in a row. I did see her do a couple somersaults and I did see Cole jump into the ball pit once in the whole 45 minutes of the class...does that count??

Awww, such is life....what am I gonna do? I keep telling myself this is just a phase....I'm telling myself that a lot lately in the hopes that someday I'll actually believe it.

3 comments:

MamáChanga said...

Awww, Helene, KUDOS to you, you are so my hero. I know today was rough for you my friend, (I can read it in your post) but you did it, something I myself am just too terrified to do. That makes you MY hero AND a TERRIFIC MOM!! Cut yourself some slack chica, in MY book you are what I strive to be.

Dawn (dawn8445) said...

Hey Helene! I haven't "seen" you in forever and thought I'd check in on you. Sounds like your house is like Rompa Room JUST LIKE MINE IS!!! Will has become very aggressive and I know it's because it's his only survival mode! LOL Reading that you have a squealer made me somewhat thankful since that's what Will is! Just wanted to say hey and say that I relate and feel your pain on a daily basis! LOL Love ya girl! Dawn

joy said...

You are awesome for even doing that with them. You should feel great about your mad mommy skills! Is there no normal people left in this world? I so would have offered to help you. :)

I figure that if the children are alive when my husband gets home at the end of the day, I've done my job.

----Roseanne Barr



 
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