Monday, August 4, 2008

A lovely walk down memory lane....

I think it's fair to say that mine and Tim's marriage has not been especially wonderful these last 4 years. I really lacked the understanding of just how much kids can take a toll on your relationship. Suddenly it's not all about just US...it's about the kids. We're not just husband and wife anymore. We're now Mom and Dad and we've kind of lost sight of husband and wife. We came into parenthood with our heads spinning...."congratulations, you're having twins", which made us a family of 4. Then 18 months later, our heads were still spinning as we heard "congratulations, it's another set of twins". I don't think our heads have stopped spinning since....

So the other night, I was looking for some old pictures that I had kept on a disk but I couldn't seem to find the disk anywhere. I was specifically looking for a picture of me and some friends that had been taken almost 5 years ago, before we all had become mothers (when we all still had that bright-eyed, bushy-tailed look in our eyes and held that naive attitude that motherhood was gonna be loads of fun and completely glamorous). The kids were in bed so Tim and I went into his office and started looking through all the millions of CD's he has on his desk. We finally came across the CD I was looking for and as he loaded it up onto his laptop and saw the all the pics on the CD come up, we just sat there staring at the screen. Neither of us had realized that we had so many pictures on that CD that we hadn't seen for years. In fact, I had forgotten I even had some of them.

We sat there looking through all these old pictures and we found ourselves talking about how much fun we used to have and how happy we used to be. Like when we went to Sea World in Orlando, FL and we spent hours by the dolphin pool, feeding the dolphins and "petting" them...and I was asking him, "so do you ever think about getting married?"



Or when we went to Cancun and got so sunburnt we spent most of the vacation in our room in pain...and I was asking him, "I wonder how many couples get engaged while vacationing here?"


And the beautiful resort we stayed at while in Jamaica...and I was asking him, "so this is our LAST NIGHT in paradise....anything you wanna ask me?" and he FINALLY proposed on the beach and my ovaries threw a party and my eggs started making bets on who would get fertilized first.


Like on our wedding day 3 months later....when I was already asking him "so when exactly would you like to start trying to have kids?"


And then when we were in Hawaii for the first time in 2003, while we were doing our 1st IVF cycle and I was asking him "so what would you do if we got pregnant with twins...wouldn't that totally rock?"



And then finally on our 3rd IVF cycle in 2004, we transferred 3 perfect little embryos and received this picture, which I stared at for hours, just marveling at how life starts out and wondering about the day I'd show my future kids this pic and say, "this was you before you were....well.....you". It's still weird to me to think that one of those embryos was Cole and one was Bella. We still wonder about that 3rd embryo sometimes....


So that was our lovely walk down memory lane....we must have looked at all these pics for over an hour. Just reminiscing and talking about the "good old days". Proof that we were happy and enjoyed each other's company at some point and that maybe someday we'll be able to recapture that again (more than likely, when the kids go off to college and we're too broke from college tuition x 4 to do anything else)

7 comments:

angie said...

This was great to read. Jeff and I frequently joke that our kids have ruined our lives. We wouldn't change anything, or course, but in a way, it's true. Kids change you......definitely can't be selfish anymore, but especially multiples. I can't believe how much more taxing they are than just one at a time. I think you should throw all caution to the wind and go away together. Alone.

Jeff and I just did for the first time and it was heavenly.

angie said...

Oh, and the pictures are so great!

joy said...

The pictures are so fun to look at. I don't remember what it's like to just be a couple and not "mom" and "dad" I would love to get away, maybe in a couple years, a girl can dream...

Supermom said...

I totally understand. I look forward to time with my husband again,

Susie said...

What GREAT pictures! Oh, to be young, in love, and on a beach somewhere again.....sigh......
You are absolutely beautiful!!!~espcecially that wedding picture HOLY COW!
You should also be up for sainthood too after experiencing 2 rounds of IVF--how strong are you??? goodness!

Chatabox Girl said...

Of course you can photoshop out certain peopl. Why did you think i learnt those tricks :)

But your photos look great. Its amazing what you can keep on the computer.

Those pics are amazing! you and your husband are really lucky. Hopefully you can get some couple time in soon!

Cynthia said...

Great post! Thanks for the reminder to take time and remember the person we chose to start a family with in the first place. And great pictures!!

I figure that if the children are alive when my husband gets home at the end of the day, I've done my job.

----Roseanne Barr



 
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