Sunday, December 7, 2008

"Because Mommy said so, that's why"

When I was a child and my mother used to use that statement on me "Because I said so, that's why", it used to drive me nuts. I swore I would never say that to my child(ren). But then again, I said I wouldn't do a lot of things when I had kids and I'm guilty of doing 99.9% of them every single day.

So this morning, we were running around here like chickens with our heads cut off trying to get the kids ready to go to a friend's child's birthday party. We were practically begging them to get dressed and put their shoes on. I finally declared, "why are Daddy and I struggling to get you all ready to go to a birthday's not like we're headed to the dr's office or anything....if you all aren't ready in the next 10 minutes, we are NOT going to the party so if you REALLY wanna go, I suggest you all start cooperating and get your butts in gear".

The biggest protest came from Bella. She had on a really cute outfit that I had just gotten for her and I was about to put her hair in a ponytail. She managed to find an old pair of swimming goggles from last summer and insisted on wearing them. I said, "you can't wear swimming goggles because when you take them off, it'll mess up your ponytail". She responded, "well, I won't wear a ponytail then". I said, "you can't wear goggles because it's practically winter and you only need goggles for swimming". She responded, "that's not true...people wear goggles in the snow when they ski, I've seen it on tv". Okay....hmmm, I was gonna have to really give this some more thought. "Bella, listen, I'll level you with here, the real reason you can't wear goggles is because the other kid's at the birthday party won't have goggles to wear and they'll all be jealous. So it's only fair for you to leave the goggles at home". She seemed to be mulling it over but then said, "I'll just tell them to ask Santa for some goggles like mine". I said, trying to be funny, "Bella, you kinda look like a frog with those goggles on". She looked at me and said, "yeah and frogs are cute". Heck, I was even so desperate, I said, "I don't think unicorns like goggles" and she argued with me that unicorns do indeed like goggles and they wear them to protect their eyes from the rainbows because they don't like rainbows.

By now, I'm sure I had steam coming out of my ears. I was tired of being nice and I was tired of debating this with her. I finally just said, "You are NOT wearing the goggles and that's final". She frowned....I said, "I'm gonna go take a picture of you so you can see yourself and realize how silly you look".

I showed her both of those pictures and I said, "now, look, don't you agree that this looks pretty silly?? I'm glad you want to make a fashion statement but I don't think wearing goggles in 40 degree weather to an INDOOR birthday party is the way to go". She smiled, looked at the pictures, and said, "I like looking silly, why can't I wear the goggle if I want to look silly?".

So I broke it down for her, "BECAUSE MOMMY SAID SO, THAT'S WHY!!!!! NOW GET THOSE GOGGLES OFF YOUR HEAD AND LET ME GET YOUR HAIR IN A PONYTAIL SO WE CAN GO TO THE PARTY". She wasn't happy about it but she finally gave in and let me take the goggles away. And just as I suspected, not 10 minutes later, she had forgotten all about the goggles. But man oh man, debating back and forth with her like that wore me out. I was mentally exhausted.

It just makes me shudder to think what the teenage years will be like with her.


Lana said...

The other day I had my facebook status set at "Ahh, the things we say we would never do BEFORE we become mothers. Then we have kids and it ALL changes, doesn't it."

At least Bella's a good little negotiator! (even if it drives you to rip out your hair!!)

I love the unicorn argument. So very logical. Lol!!

Anonymous said...

I totally over use the "Because I Said So!" phrase. Used to drive me nuts when my mom used to say it...

Claroux said...

OH.MY.GOD. I BURST out laughing when I saw those pictures! I laughed so loud that J actually came into the spare room to see what all the noise was about. Those are FANTASTIC photos and it's a FANTASTIC post. One you save for eternity and torture her with when she starts dating!!!!! I am seriously impressed with her negotiation skills.

I have yet to find need for the "Because I said so" comment and I'm sure I will CRINGE the first time I use it. I've already caught myself licking my fingers and using my spit to clean all sorts of things off my children and I shudder each time I catch myself doing it. I read a book shortly after the girls were born called "I was a really good Mom until I had kids." It was hysterical! I swore my kids would NEVER even know what a TV was - until I realized that Baby Einstein was like crack and I could take a 30 minute shower when it was on. the list goes on and on. Again - GREAT post :-)

ParentingPink said...

Lovely! I have had so many of those "fashion disaster" moments with my daughters. LOL And yes, I do use the phrase "BECAUSE I SAID SO" on occasion. Yep, I feel like my mom to, but hey, sometimes it's the only thing that works! LOL

Creative Junkie said...

Those photos made me laugh!

If I had a dollar for every time I screamed BECAUSE I SAID SO, I could bail out every single industry in the US.

I think it's our God given right to use that phrase and I bet you can't find a mom who hasn't used it at least once.

Show me a mom who hasn't used that phrase and I'll show you a mom who's using waaaaay too much prozac.

Supermom said...

I always say "because I said so!"

A kid will say "why?"

My response, "I am the mom, I don't have to have a reason!"

Michelle :)

ComfyMom~Stacey said...

I say "Because it is a rule." so I can avoid saying 'because I said so'.

Sometimes I add "blame the government" So my kids now believe the state has a law that you cannot were flip flops outside when it is 40 degrees and raining.

Kim said...

Oh, what a good laugh I had reading this! Those pictures really capture the irony. She's such a big girl with an independent spirit, but still a little girl with her sippy cup and silly goggles. So, so cute! Loved this post!

Paula Constable said...

Love the picture. She's thank you for that some day. Yes, I fear the teenage years!

twinmama said...

Hilarious! She is truly an impressive little girl for her ability to negotiate with you. Even though she didn't win, she really held her own. I am sure it was frustrating though because when there is no reasoning with a kid.

I don't even want to think about the teenage years - it is going to be scary with 2 girls!!

Corrine said...

that is awesome! just the fact that she wanted to wear the goggles...glad you won the battle...though I think she would have been a hit :)

and i use the "im the mom thats why!!" a lot.

barb said...

Well, she'll get her payback some day, as we all do! Hang in there!

Ambulance Mommy said...

Hahahaha.....that's so true! The amount of things I said I would NEVER do, or repeat what my mom said, I find myself saying them all the time!!

Boy that Bella is going to be fun!!!! She's such a cutie! You are doing a great job!

Doré said...

It looks like you are definitely gonna have you hands full when she gets older... At least you will only have the 1 teenage girl. From what I hear, boys are much easier the older they get.

Bella is one smart cookie and can definitely hang when it comes to comebacks!

3 Bay B Chicks said...

I saw this post the other day, but didn't have a chance to comment until now. Love, love, love the photo. I think you captured the very essence of Bella's protest.

Photos like these are priceless. Just think about its potential in the future. Definitely will get some great laughs when you include it in the slide show for her wedding! :)


I figure that if the children are alive when my husband gets home at the end of the day, I've done my job.

----Roseanne Barr

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