Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Note to self: Never leave hubby alone to supervise the kids again!

On Sunday afternoon, after Garrett and Landon were down for a nap, I asked Tim if he'd be able to entertain Cole and Bella so I could go upstairs and watch a couple shows that I had tivo'd while I folded laundry. "Sure", he had said, "no problem".

One hour later, I started to come downstairs and heard nothing but silence. Normally, this is a very bad sign. And today it was as well. There I saw Cole and Bella sitting at the kitchen table, with a whole bag of fig newtons ripped open and all cut in small pieces. Where was Tim? Snoozing away on the sofa. Apparently, they had decided to seize the moment and take advantage of this rare opportunity of being completely unsupervised.

According to Cole, Bella MADE him climb up on the counter and get the scissors out of the knife block (thank God it was just the scissors and not any of the knives). Then she FORCED him to get the unopened, brand new bag of fig newtons out of the LOCKED cabinet (child-proof locks...yeah right). He stood there and watched helplessly while she proceeded to cut all the fig newtons into small pieces and put them on the plates from her tea set. He begged, he pleaded with her, saying, "Mommy is gonna be so mad at you". But then she knocked him to the ground and sat on his back and cut some hair off the back of his head. Then she stuck her tongue out at him.

According to Bella, it was Cole's idea to climb up on the counter and get the scissors out of the knife block. He then showed her how to unlock the cabinet, because she had no idea how to do it. Then he MADE her open the package of fig newtons and TOLD her to cut them up into small pieces, since she's better with the scissors than he is. She didn't want to do it but he threatened her by cutting off some of his own hair and telling her that he would tell Mommy that SHE cut his hair off if she didn't do what he said.

During all this, Tim was completely oblivious as to what they were up to. He heard absolutely NOTHING. How is that possible? He explained that he must have fallen into a deep sleep. Really?! Then he said, "well, how come you didn't hear them?".....oh, yeah, sure....turn this around on me!! I said, "I was upstairs with the TV on and I thought you were supervising them so I gave myself permission to not be on alert for a couple hours!"

So who really was guilty of this crime? I decided to go with my gut on this one. Look at the smile on Bella's face. Does this look like someone who was FORCED to do something against her will? It looks more like a "oh crap, I'm totally busted" look, if you ask me.



And as for Cole's hair, it did look like a small area of hair was much shorter than the others but fortunately since he's a boy with short hair, it's not that noticeable. Plus, I had a really hard time believing that he could reach that far back on his own head to cut his hair with scissors that big. But once again, Bella gets an A+ for creative story-telling.



As I sat there, listening to each of them blame the other, all I could think of was this adorable picture I happened to get of them after they had fallen asleep on the drive over to the gym the other day. Now I know why my friend Jen once told me, "Do you know why children look like angels when they sleep? It's so you don't kill them when they're awake!"

30 comments:

Lana said...

Oh those little stinkers!!
I had to crack up when I saw the picture of Bella with all the figs in bowls and plates..and cups! Hey, at least they weren't all over the floor! Lovin the little grin she has.

As a parent of an "over embellisher" myself, I can appreciate their stories. Sometimes I let Mackenzie go on for a while, just to see where the story will go. I wonder if her and Bella are related some how?...Hmmm.

How can men "shut off"?? I may be able to fall asleep on the couch, but I wake up if it gets too quiet! No fair!

Michele S said...

What an amazing coincidence. That's EXACTLY how Greg watches the kids. I'll never forget the time I ran to the store to buy milk when they were two, and came home to find them SITTING on top of the six foot wall, waving at me. They had conspired together to pull the ladder up and climbed up there. Where was Greg? In the house watching tv. He didn't even KNOW they were outside.

So I feel your pain, sista. I almost pinch myself when go on vacation and come back and they are all alive.

Yaya said...

Hahahaha! Too funny! Oh my gosh, I love it.

eight helping hands said...

I'm glad to know that my husband isn't the only one to fall asleep on duty! Doesn't that just drive you nuts. I use to get so mad, that I eventually gave up on having any breaks. Or was that the plan all along. I'm glad the kids didn't hurt themselves, or end up with mohhawks.

motheringmymiraclemultiples said...

Oh her grin just gave it all away. She looks like that cat that ate the canary.

See, if I leave the kids with the hubby, I come home to 4 empty bottles, soaking wet diapers, and a frustrated man who tells me that "my kids went nuts the minute I walked out the door".

But it is not like I can send the hubby to the grocery store...he would come back with beer and pork rinds......and that's it.

Creative Junkie said...

ROTF! I loved their different versions! This made me laugh this morning - thank you!

LaurieJ said...

I can laugh at this because it's not my kids right? :-)
Thanks for the cute post this morning & she looks totally guilty!

kristi said...

LOL....very cute. Typical husband behavior!

Tabbatha Rose said...

Thats why I only do things when they are sleeping LOL. Actually mine cant get into too much just yet but it doesnt mean they wont try.

My hubby falls asleep in the evenings when Im in the shower though, thank goodness there's nogin keeping them occupied and an 18 or 15 yr old sister around at some point.

mrsbear said...

Your daughter has the makings of one great novelist. lol. I think you made the right choice to see through her rouse. As far as daddies baby sitting...yeah, their vigilance leaves something to be desired. ;)

Cascia said...

Kids do the goofiest things sometimes. That is such a great story and I enjoyed reading it. Your kids are adorable.

Kim said...

I had to laugh at the sheer (or is that shear?!) AMOUNT of cookies! That's a ton of fig newtons!

newlyweds said...

Oh No, and seems so very typical of the men I know as well, ha ha. I hate to laugh but the look on Bella's priceless. Poor Cole the victim of a scissor crime, where were the younger twins???

ParentingPink said...

I couldn't stop giggling! Your kids remind me so much of mine! And when I leave them with their dad, they certainly find similar mischief!

Tam said...

Oh my gosh! That is a great little episode to document. :-) That sly little smile certainly does look like a "busted" expression. Good call!

Elizabeth Channel said...

That is the greatest thing I have seen in a long time!

Sharlene said...

Oh lordy. I have had my son bring me a knife before. I guess he figured out the "baby proofed" drawers.

Morgan said...

ah, the let's cut eachother's hair stage. Isn't it fun?

Kate said...

Oh my word, what in the world??? Dude, you are better than I, again - if my husband did that I would seriously punch him in the face, and he knows it. I obviously have some anger management that needs to be done. Oh, and I'm so glad none of them poked their eyes out with the scissors.

Hajar said...

YIKES! What a mess! Little stinkers grabbed their chance, didn't they?

Ashlee said...

Hilarious. Sounds like something my husband would do -- maybe it's just men in general?

heather@it'stwinsanity said...

Nice story! It is scary how good they are at telling what "really" happened!

Christine said...

Oh My I give Bella the award for the bigest whopper.. lol I am glad it wasn't any worse than it was (Like Cole cutting Bella's hair or getting the knives out instead) I use to have to keep the knives on top of the fridge when my kids were little and you can only imagine how difficult that was for me since I am about a quarter of an inch shy of 5 feet lol.

I did get a good laugh though and that sleeping picture of Cole and Bella was priceless. You should of got a sleeping pic og tim to make a scrapbook page of the twins adventure. lol

barb said...

Oooooh boy! I don't get how men are so oblivious either.

Elle said...

You do have to give her credit for her vivid imagination. Maybe she'll be a writer too! What is it about Dads that they can fall so sound asleep that they don't hear anything?

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Tracy said...

Oh my gosh. Thank you for my daily laugh. :) Don't worry, I have more than one of them, but I can always count on you, it seems.

Retro Heather said...

Oh Dear Lord! Just the thought of this gives me a heart attack! LOL! You poor thing, are you ever going to allow yourself to take a few minutes ever again?

I can totally relate to silence being bad. My son is always dead quiet when he's up to no good. And that picture of your kids sleeping is so precious. Sigh.

Connie said...

I'm enjoying this because they're not my children, sorry! But, they did have some very good stories so I give them an A for imagination and creativity. Even the whole cookie scheme had a lot of creativity.

Doré said...

What a funny story! I bet they keep you laughing all the time.

I'm glad no one was hurt with the scissors.

Anthony is the same way. Brayden will go into the room daddy is on the computer and Anthony is "watching" him. Brayden loves going in there with daddy because he gets to play with things that are NOT allowed... so much for watching him!

I figure that if the children are alive when my husband gets home at the end of the day, I've done my job.

----Roseanne Barr



 
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