Wednesday, March 25, 2009

In his defense....

I received plenty of comments on my last post in regards to Tim not knowing my middle name. I know, right? How could we possibly know each other for almost 14 years and he doesn't know something as basic as my middle name??

It gets worse....the stranger I share a house with my husband didn't know where I was born either!! As he's preparing our taxes, as well as applying to change our medical insurance policy, he's learning quite a few things about me.

Tim: I need your SSN for this paperwork.
Me: 00*-**-****
Tim: Why does yours start with 00*? That's usually an East coast number. Weren't you born here in California?
Me: (stunned into silence).....I was born in New Hampshire. Are you saying you never knew that?
Tim: Really? New Hampshire?

I looked at him and started singing, "Yes, I like Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain...I'm not much into health food...I am into champagne....". He just stared at me. I said, "Now you're supposed to sing the part where you say...'then we laughed for a moment and I said, "I never knew...that you like Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain and the feel of the ocean and the taste of champagne'...." Kinda seems like Escape should be our song....seriously, you'd think we would've covered most of this information during our first date...maybe our second? This feels kind of....well, awkward.

So I thought I'd put him to the test and see what else he might not know. I asked him 13 questions....things I thought were basic things that he should know after being with me for FOURTEEEN YEARS.

1) Who is my oldest friend? Jen (CORRECT....although he was a bit confused by this question....he was like "do you mean oldest as in age or oldest as in time you've known her?"....awwww, yes Grasshopper, that's good paying attention....trying to trip me up and impress me, huh?)

2) Where did he and I meet? On a blind date at Chili's (CORRECT ...AND bonus points for remembering the month and year that we met without me even asking...he even went so far as to remember a stupid line he used on me during dinner when there was an awkward lull in our conversation,"so what's your sign?"....yeah, I know...and I still continued to see him after that)

3) When is our anniversary? He actually asked me,"Which one? The day we began dating exclusively or our wedding anniversary?". Again, I was stunned into silence....then I challenged him, "Okay, how about both?". Dating exclusively - November 8, 1995 (Holy donkey balls.....he actually remembered the exact date). Wedding anniversary - August 10, 2002 (CORRECT....I waited for him to add, "the happiest day of my life" but he didn't....guess that's too much to ask for)

4) What is my favorite holiday? Christmas (Buzzer says "ehhhh" WRONG). This is when Bella interrupted the quiz and said, "Her favorite holiday is Halloween, Daddy". Good to know my kid pays attention to the important things in life (and she probably only remembers this because I steal half of her candy from her after we go trick-or-treating).

5) What is my favorite season? Fall (CORRECT....yet he can't remember that my favorite holiday is Halloween? I mean, fall and Halloween go hand in hand, right?)

6) When is my birthday and how old will I be? After rolling his eyes and saying "give me a break", he said "April 1 and you'll be 40" (CORRECT....that's 8 days away, honey dear....I'm just sayin)

7) What's my favorite color? Small hesitation on this one....Um, blue? (Is that your final answer?) Um, hmmmm, yeah blue (You're pretty sure? Do you want to use one of your lifelines and call my sister?) Cut the crap, Regis....I know it's blue. (CORRECT...and, dude, what's up with the attitude? You got yourself into this situation!)

Small beads of sweat are forming on his forehead....the kids and I are staring him down. He asks, "Are you putting all this on your blog?" I say, "Your damn right I am". Now he realizes he's under some serious pressure.

8) What's my favorite food? Sushi (CORRECT....I'd honestly be shocked if he hadn't gotten this one right....I live for sushi and he knows it...but then again, I thought he knew what my middle name was...)

9) Where did he propose? Jamaica (CORRECT....yeah, that's right...on the very last night of our 7-day vacation when I was practically in tears thinking marriage may not be in the cards for us...but then he asked "So what do you think about spending the rest of your life with me as my wife?"....before I could answer him, I heard my uterus yell to my ovaries, "Hey guys, DID YOU HEAR THAT??? We can put our retirement plans on hold". My ovaries yelled back, "Well, praise be to God....we were THIS close to shriveling up and rotting away!" )

At this point, I thought I'd catch him off guard....

10) What color are my eyes? He says, "Come on, now!! This is just stupid. They're brown". (CORRECT....and for your information, Tim, don't think I didn't get that whole "come on now....." crap was a stalling technique, while you looked deeply into my eyes for more than a millisecond before answering)

11) What is my ideal vacation....somewhere tropical and relaxing, somewhere where we can go sightseeing the whole time or an outdoor adventure? Somewhere tropical and relaxing (CORRECT....so when are we leaving for Hawaii?? Oh, and did I mention that my birthday is in 8 days?)

12) What is my favorite type of movie....romance, drama, action adventure or comedy? Well, that depends....(quit stalling....final answer please?) Okay, well probably comedy but I know you like romance too. In order of preference, I'd say comedy, romance, drama then action adventure. (SEMI-CORRECT....I'd say it was comedy, drama, romance and then action adventure but that's getting a little picky, don't you agree?)

13) Which celebrity would I leave you in a heartbeat for? *rolls eyes* (I'm serious...come on, answer it) Mark Wahlberg (CORRECT....I love me some Marky Mark but you should also know that I've been digging Seth Rogen quite a bit since seeing Superbad....so it'd be a toss up between the two of them) SETH ROGEN? Are you serious? Geez, should I feel offended at all? (Nah...you know me, always rooting for the underdog...) Yeah, thanks for that.

So did he pass the test? In my opinion, I think he did pretty well. Much better than I anticipated. And it's a good thing for him because I'm pretty sure that Seth Rogen is still single.

40 comments:

**~~Nikki**~~ said...

See, he is not that bad grl. LOL

Once when DH and I were just seeing each other, we were at the video store setting up our accounts and the guy working the store ask if he want me on his account, DH said yes. Then the guy ask what my name was,well loving DH knew my 1st name and then turned around and said to me, Nikki, what is ur last night? I was so mad but all I could do was laugh. Maybe he was thinking with the wrong brain again. LMAO

Morgan said...

He did pretty good! Pretty funny that he didn't realize where you were born, though. Did you move around a lot when you were a kid?

Morgan said...

He did pretty good! Pretty funny that he didn't realize where you were born, though. Did you move around a lot when you were a kid?

Sherry said...

Hilarious! My DH never fails to shock me with his lack of knowledge either. ;)

Tina said...

That is so funny. I think he got a lot right, does he get a prize? Oh and do you think after all that reminding he will get your a bday gift?

Journey on! by Kelleye said...

OMG- this is so funny- You should be a stand up for mommies! LOL
I think we are married to twins!
I love the part about- are you going to put this on your blog? something mine would say for sure!
Oh..... If you seek amy? Say real fast- as in a song and it spells out a 4letter word-me... by Brittany S. I have to give her credit on trying to come back- that is pretty sly! Just not so much when your 4 yr. old spells it out after hearing the song!!

Shelli (wishes she was) Mrs. Burchett;) said...

My Tim was having back surgery a couple months ago and he told the nurse to add as his emergency contact person he said "Please don't ask me how to spell her last name!"

Normally, I would have been offended, but he was so doped up on Vicodin that he couldn't remember his OWN middle name! lol

MamaHen Em said...

I think he did really well! Also, I'M the one who can't remember anniversaries, birthdates and the like, so no judgement from this corner! By the way, have you seen Seth Roggen with his hair cut for that new movie he is in? I think he looks alright :)

Anonymous said...

13) Jason Statham

Karen said...

I guess he somewhat redeemed himself after the middle name and birth place blunders.

I was laughing out loud at your aside about the conversation between your uterus and ovaries on the night he proposed. I've only been dating Philip a year and I'm starting to feel that way! (Probably because I'm 32 and all of my friends have been married for 5+ years.)

♥georgie♥ said...

Okay this was such a cute and fun post I may have to borrow it!

we are alike on 4 and 5

Your hubby did great

Nikki B. said...

this is hilarious! i'm totally doing this to my husband!

i don't know...maybe i should just leave it alone...

Fearless Mom said...

i'm guessing he doesn't notice when you get your hair cut or colored, right?

MEN!

Juls said...

Good for him!! I wonder how my hubs would do?!? Better leave it at that...
Thanks for stopping by my blog today!

Savvy Little Women - Kate said...

So funny! I don't know if I would even try this with mine... :)

newlyweds said...

He did excellent! And I have to mention this because I just completed our taxes, and I must say your Hubby should get double points just for doing the taxes! UGH!

I think I am going to ask my hubby these same questions, and see how it goes.

The Mama said...

FUNNY! I think I am going to do that too. Last nite, I was grilling him on the twins. Since today is their 5th birthday. Like how much they weighed, time they were born, length, hopsital stays, things that happen. LOL! It was hilarious. He was like, WOMEN REMEMBER MORE! Whatever!

Kathy B! said...

How fun! I think he did perfectly well. If they know TOO much then it gets boring, right?! Or is that just how I make myself feel better?? Hmmmm.

Jen said...

He know the important stuff. What's a name its not important.
And your line about your ovaries coming out of retirement cracked me up. LOL!!!!

Christina said...

WHOA!my hubby to be and I started exclusivly dating on november 8 2008! scarey!

Go TIM! haha

The Daily Dean Chronicals said...

FFFFUUUUNNNYYY! I think we are married to long lost twins! My hubby is the same! It's amazing what is absorbed and what is not! My hubby remembers the wierdest stuff and forgets the "important" stuff! Thanks for a good giggle!

3 Bay B Chicks said...

Great post, Helene! In my opinion, he more than passed. I must admit that I am a bit surprised, but super happy!

I'd keep him around at least for a few more weeks! :)

-Francesca

Tracy said...

He passed. Well done. :)

And I LOVE LOVE LOVE me some Marky Mark, too. I've got the good vibrations for that one (winky winky.)

Stacey said...

LOL He does seem to have the more important things memorized. I guess it's priority - eye color rules over middle name. ;o)

Also, I'm pretty sure that Seth Rogan has a girlfriend. That makes me sad because I, too, would be with him in a heartbeat. LOL

Tess said...

I know how the "men" thing goes. I dont think Ill ask those questions to mine since he's been in the dog house lately-lol!

mrsbear said...

Aw, he did pretty well considering the birth state and middle name debacle. Good job, Tim.

I've loved Seth Rogen since watching Knocked Up on DVD, he just has this sloppy charm that's just too dang adorable. I also have a thing for Johnny Depp, but that's faded a bit since it seems he's got no sense of humor.

Tracy said...

So I have to ask. Hasn't he done the taxes in the past 14 years, that he's just now getting around to finding out the answers to these questions?

Laura said...

Gosh, this was so stinkin' funny!! I am so glad he passed!! Whew! I sweatin' it for the hubby!

MommyAmy said...

LOL, I'm still cracking up! Love the, "Is this going on your blog??" Hubs hates it when I talk about him on mine. lol

Michele S said...

OMG. It's like I'm married to TIM!

We got married ON my birthday and Greg still doesn't know when our anniversary or my birthday is. I bet he has no idea what my middle name is. I'm going to go ask him.

delaney55 said...

He answered those pretty well if you ask me. I could tell you where we went, what movie we saw and other pertinent info on our first date but as to the date or even the day of the week for sure....ah, no. But in my defense it was over 30yrs ago and I'm not sure if Hubby would know the date either.

Yaya said...

He did good! I don't think my hubby would do as well!

You know what drives me crazy? I've had my husband's ss # memorized forever because of paperwork, etc and he STILL has to ask me mine every time!

Hajar Zamzam Ismail said...

Lucky for him he did so well, I can see it now: Tim lining the dog house with the warmest blanket he can find. Heehee.

cluckandtweet.com said...

This line of questioning could be very, very dangerous. Plus, I can barely remember our anniversary or how old I am (one year, I swear, I thought I was a year older than I actually was) or even my name.

Sharlene said...

Well it turns out he does know something about you after all. Good that he isn't completely hopeless.

Nancy said...

LOL! Good job hubby! I think I might need to put my husband to the test. I'm afraid it'll backfire on me though and he'll then ask me questions and I'll fail! I was the one that insisted we get married on a holiday so that I could remember our anniversary.. heheheh

Elizabeth Channel said...

Ah, well, I did make a plate at a pottery class that listed the wrong year of our marriage...And I will never hear the end of it, mind you!

Creative Junkie said...

Sigh.

I'm not even going to think about giving Nate this test.

Because after the initial "who are you, again?" it might just all go downhill.

I love your posts. Seriously.

melissa78 said...

This was great!! gave me a great laugh. My b/f ran in to see what I was laughing at and did not think it was as funny as I did. I said keep it up or you will be getting this test too.

Onna said...

Hysterical!! My husband is always asking me questions like that!! LOL- when was our first date etc!! He has a better memory then me for those things- but don't ask him what medicine or vitamins I give the kids each night! LOL

By the way Happy Birthday - Tomorrow!!

Onna

I figure that if the children are alive when my husband gets home at the end of the day, I've done my job.

----Roseanne Barr



 
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