Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Well, throw an apron on me and call me Betty Crocker...

Okay, so you all remember when I "attempted" to make a sample dinosaur cake for Cole a few weeks ago? Remember I thought I could just throw on a Supermom cape and suddenly become the next Betty Crocker? I know, I know...it's gonna take more than a cape with magical powers to turn me into an awesome baker. But just hang with me for a minute....

So last week, I begged asked one of my good friends, Mary, to help me make Cole and Bella's birthday cakes this past week. I needed support, I needed encouragement, I needed someone to throw cold water in my face and scream, "For God's sake, stop freaking out...it's only cake!!" (not that Mary did that but she may have wanted to...I'll probably never know).

She dedicated TWO ENTIRE DAYS to helping me with these cakes. Yes, folks, that is what I call true friendship. A friend who, even though she's feeling kinda crummy, gives up 2 whole days to help another friend in need. So she threw her kids to the wolves...uh, I mean, she brought her kids over to play with my kids, which is really the same thing as throwing them to the wolves, when you think about it. Once the kids were out of our hair engaged in play, we went to work on the cakes.

Our first batch of marshmallow fondant was....well, not so great. We just kept throwing more powdered sugar on it, then turning the Kitchen Aide mixer off, touching the fondant with our fingers and then saying to one another, "Do you think it's done now?" Then we'd both just shrug our shoulders while I poured more sugar into the bowl.

The second batch of fondant came out so well that we were squealing with delight, clapping our hands and screaming "Hercules, hercules, hercules". No need to say it....I'll happily admit that I'm a dork and it's the little things in life that make me happy, like when Garrett and Landon wait to poop in their diaper until the minute Tim walks through the door after a day at work.

I had already baked the cakes so they were ready to go. The buttercream frosting was out-of-this-world yummy and ready to go. The fondant was ready to go. Well, sorta....we had to knead the coloring into the fondant, which sucked big time. We both ended up getting a great core workout....I even pulled a muscle in my stomach. Good God, the things I go through out of love for my children. I'm not sure why Mary did it, though....except that perhaps she loves my children as much as she loves her own but then again I don't recall her offering to take any of my kids home with her (for the rest of their lives)...so maybe not.

We worked on Cole's cake first. Our brains were in sync as we worked, as if we could read each other's minds...."oh, let's use blue fondant for the water" and "let's make a little nest out of a piece of brownie and put jelly bellies in it as dinosaur eggs" and "what's the best excuse I can use to get out of having sex with my husband tonight?" (oh wait, maybe that was just me).

Here is our masterpiece.....a 40-lb monstrosity of a dinosaur cake. No jelly bellies resembling poop this time...just really cool rocks made out of fondant...



Then the real work started when we began Bella's Barbie cake. Originally, I had this idea to make Barbie's dress out of fondant. Apparently, the fondant had other ideas. It sat on the counter double wrapped in saran wrap, which was fine....except it sat there for about 4 hours before we used it. Then I failed to microwave it long enough to become pliable, which would have made it a hell of a lot easier to roll out.

As we both worked feverishly to roll out the fondant to a big enough piece to cover Barbie's skirt, I was panicking. I kept saying, "It's not gonna be big enough", "It's getting all dried out and cracked" but Mary kept her cool. I just know she wanted to slap me and yell "Snap out of it" (you know, Cher style) but she refrained. She took her frustration out on the fondant, which was resisting her efforts like 2 extremely tired toddlers who are desperately fighting off sleep (not that I would know anything about that, right?).

Finally, when it was pretty obvious that the whole brilliant fondant skirt idea that I had was gonna go over like a fart in church, we decided to make the skirt out of buttercream frosting with little fondant flowers all around it. The final touch was a light dusting of purple shimmer dust over the buttercream frosting...it really added a nice sparkle to the dress.

Barbie loved her new look. How do I know? Because she had a huge smile on her face the whole time.



The kids loved their cakes....



Oh wait, that was the wrong picture. Really, they loved their cakes...see...



So my cake baking extravaganza was a success....I think. Everyone seemed to like the cakes...except my mom of course, who was completely shocked that I could actually do something other than conceive and give birth to 4 little human beings in a matter of only 2 years. I know, right?

And thanks to Mary, I did not need to be locked away in a padded cell, while mumbling something about how I deserve my own cooking show now...or, at the very least, a high-5 from Martha Stewart herself in the form of a message on Twitter that reads "congratulations, it's a good thing".

* Mary just started a new blog...she's a fantastic writer with a great sense of humor (see, that's why we click so well...it's the humor thing). If you're looking for a fun blog to read, head on over to The Fantabulous Rants of a Multi-directional Momma



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70 comments:

Jennifer said...

Since she helped you through that marathon cake baking extravaganza, I will go and visit her blog. But geez woman, could you have picked more ambitious cakes to make?! LOL! At the first sign of discouragement, I would have called Safeway and placed and order! ;-) And I just loved their faces in the first picture! BAHAHAHAAAA! Love this post! Congratulations! I hope they were just as tasty as they looked!

MrsM said...

Wow-those look amazing! Great job =)

Yaya said...

Awesome job!

You are hilarious...get out of sex...lol!

Mom of Three said...

Those are awesome! Go you!

DysFUNctional Mom said...

I'm still laughing at "Hercules! Hercules!" Those cakes are awesome! I am impressed.

Buckeroomama said...

You made those cakes, now you can do ANYTHING! Wow, seriously. Well done!

I won't even attempt to do one...

Off to check out Mary's blog. :)

Stephanie Faris said...

Oh my gosh. Those look AWESOME! Does marshmallow fondant taste okay? Fondant has always tasted waxy to me.

JennyMac said...

You are amazing!!! My word those look so great. 40 pound cake? That kind of frightens me. LOL.

Amanda said...

That reminds me of my Bob the Builder cake...who thought flannel check shirt would take so much work. I didn't even want to cut it! GREAT JOB!!!

Brooke said...

wow. i'm impressed! those both look awesome!

Laura said...

OMGosh!!! I am pea green with envy! You did such a GREAT job and those cakes looks FABULOUS! Unfortunately, I don't have a friend that can devote that kind of time - or with that kind of talent - so I will continue to BUY Alise's cakes! Ha! That first pic of the kids with unhappy faces scared me! So glad they liked them, too!

Mighty M said...

Those cakes turned out great! My daughter would love the barbie one!!

April said...

WOW! the barbie cake looks AMAZING!
those cakes show much LOVE :)

blueviolet said...

I can not believe what you went through to create those cakes. They really are cute!!!

2 Toddlers and Me said...

Those cakes are incredible! What a wonderful memory for the kids and you. Was it difficult cutting them?Hope the kids had a wonderful birthday and I'm off to check out Mary's blog too.

Lee the Hot Flash Queen said...

I am bowing down to your fondant making cake baking wonder. I don't even know what fondant is, but those cakes are amazing!! Sassy Gal's birthday is in a few weeks...wanna whip me up a paint palate and brush for her??

Morgan said...

Helene, you guys did fantastic. I've never tried fondant before, but it looks like you guys did great with it! I like how the frosting turned out on the dress w/ fondant flowers. The cakes were beautiful!

Sadia said...

OH. MY. GOD.

(I do not use all caps or OMG lightly.)

O.M.G.

The two of your ARE Betty Crocker. Did you know that Betty Crocker never existed? Never. She's a marketing ploy. A figment of an advertiser's imagination. And you are her. I knew you were too good to be true.

Those cakes are stupendous. I'll be making a Mary Poppins barbie cake in about 7 months time. Expect a flurry of e-mails asking for advice.

What did you end up doing for the volcano? It turned out great!

Sara @ Domestically Challenged said...

Amazing, amazing, amazing! I love both of them! What's a pulled tummy muscle compared to that!?

A Real Housewife said...

Way to go on the cakes--they're fabulous! And no, you're not alone. Every wife has "those" thoughts before their husband gets home. ;)

Kelly said...

OMG!! You did an amazing job. Will you come bake all my cakes? Pretty pretty please?!? If not, then will you at least teach me to make cakes that wont cause me to say, "It doesn't matter what it looks like. It's the taste that counts!" ?

Nezzy said...

Impressive job! No really, I'm not just blowin'! My mother decorated cakes professionally. I dabble so I know from where I speak. I'm so happy Mary was able and willing to help. Most of us only made one birthday cake at a time.

Have a super day and give yourself a big old pat on the back!

Liz @ Sugarplum Creations said...

Oh my word, Helene! I mean, I knew you were an awesome gal, but this is amazing! Can you come over to my house, say, January, and help out with Kam's first birthday cake? Thanks!

Michelle Hoad said...

Very cute! I have always been too scared to try fondant. It looks so good on the cakes, I might have to give it a shot. It would help if I had a friend to come over and help. Do you loan out Mary?

Betty Manousos:cutand-dry.blogspot.com said...

Those cakes look delicious.
SO AMAZING!! Great job you did
xxx

MamaOtwins+1 said...

The second cake is SOO much better than the first. I am so happy for you, and I love the barbie cake.

I also doubled over at the wrong picture for them loving their cakes. They had great faces there.

HeartNiki said...

Those cakes rock! You have totally inspired me to make my daughters this year. :)

Megan said...

Those are freaking awesome. I bow to your cake decorating skills. lol


SO... i have a kids b-day in Nov, what time are you coming over? lol

Nancy@ifevolutionworks.com said...

Awesome and amazing!!!! Really, I am impressed. I can't bake to save my life!

The Mother said...

Amazing cakes.

And you weren't even still working on them when the guests arrived, like I always was.

Lucky kids.

Karen said...

Those cakes look incredible! Too good to eat!

So I had this random dream last night that I brought my roommate to your house to watch your kids while you and I hung out and went to a movie. How funny is that??

Jenny said...

That was so awesome of her to come help you! The cakes look great and I bet the kids were pretty excited about them!

Kristina P. said...

Holy crap! You are amazing!

Semi-Slacker Mom said...

Suzy Homemaker is what you are. Grow veggies, make cakes, herd twins. Go ahead & sew yourself that cape!

And I'm going to need a candyland themed cake in December. Take your time, you've got 2 months!

Twins Squared said...

Okay, first of all I didn't think writing about baking a cake could be so funny. Thanks for the laugh! Second, I have no idea what fondant even is. Third, baking my two cakes for K&M's bday nearly killed me and all I did was slap some frosting on top and a few sprinkles. You go girl! You are going to need a massage to recover.

Tracy said...

Wow! I am way impressed, especially with the Barbie cake. Way to go, momma!

Corrie Howe said...

What lovely cakes. I'm always so impressed (jealous) of people who make such nice cakes. I have twin brother and one of them just twin daughters. Lots of fun over here!

Carly said...

Way to go Martha! I kinda miss the one Dino eating the other one! Lol . Love the pictures.

Karen, author of "My Funny dad, Harry" said...

Those cakes are fantastic, especially the Barbie one! Good thing the kids liked them after all that work that went into them. Mary must be a super friend to help you out with that! I'm on my way to her blog now.

Tsquared417 said...

Awesome job! I could never have done either of those.

newlyweds said...

They look amazing Great job!! And yea to Mary for helping you out, I am in need of Mary, can you send her to Texas?

kyslp said...

Those are so cute! You guys did a great job! (Sure puts my Wal-Mart b-day cakes to shame.)

I will be following your friend.

shortmama said...

Those cakes look flippin great!

Sharlene said...

Those cakes were awesome! I am so impressed. I didn't even make my kids a cake. I pawned off a boxed cake on my mom. I am that pathetic. So I can count on you to make Mari and Ben's cakes next year right? Right?

HeartNiki said...

YOU HAVE WON AN AWARD! Come get it here: http://mrsratlady.blogspot.com/2009/10/over-top-award.html

Jessica said...

Those are the most beautiful cakes I have ever seen.

Mary K Brennan said...

I don't know how you pulled that one off. Those cakes look fantastic. I utilize the bakery, but one day would love to surprise the kids. Even if I did, I don't think they would believe Mom baked it.

MamaHen Em said...

I already thought you were a rock star mama, but now... those cakes are AMAZING!!

Mrsbear said...

They look amazing. Wow! You guys should be proud of yourselves.

A good friend will have cake with you. A great friend will spend two days rolling out fondant!

Jen said...

Wow, you did a fabulous job. Hayden's birthday is on Monday. Can you help me?

Valerie said...

Adorable cakes! I made Barbie for Mary Catherine this year...she turned 5 and requested the glam girl herself.

Thanks so much for dropping by and visiting! It is so wonderful to hear from another IVF mom that they "get it"!!!

Love your banner BTW...God really does have a sense of humor. After multiple loses we were successful with our singleton IVF pregnancy on the 1st try, and much to our surprise, 18-months later found ourselves pregnant again. So, not multiples, like you, but very much the bonus baby after the IVF!!!

It's a weird predicament to find yourself in after years of infertility...to use birth control or not to use birth control...that is the question! LOL

Blessings,
Valerie

Valerie said...

Sorry...typo!

Losses, not loses.

Joy said...

They came out great! I think Barbie looks better with frosting because it looks like her dress has layers and is flowing. Great job! Someday your kids will look back and appreciate all that hard work!

Flory said...

You both did a great job with these cakes. The barbie cakes looks amazing!

mellisarock said...

Those are amazing!! You did such a great job!!

Rook No. 17 said...

Your cakes turned out absolutely fantastic. I love all your creative touches! The buttercream solution to the Barbie dress was perfect! Look out Duff Goldman!

Jenn @ rookno17.blogspot.com

Rebecca M. said...

Wow - I'm speechless! I'm so impressed! The cakes are amazing :)

Adie said...

wow those cakes turned out amazing. Your children are so lucky to have a mom like you!

Mrs Montoya said...

No way! Those cakes are amazing and I bow down to you and your girlfriend for making two. I lose it for days when I have to do one at a time. Nice job! Your kiddos are lucky to have you. No store bought cake could ever be as wonderful. Ever!

The Lane Family said...

Let's see are you and Mary both avaliable to come to Virginia to lend your skills :)????

Those cakes are AWESOME!! I love them. I once made a barbie cake but it looked nothing like yours, not even close and that Volcano is amazing.

On a side note I love the part about the boys waiting to poop until Tim walks through the door. That is great!!

By the way I voted for your blog on the Multiples and More site because you are just a great writer and so funny!!

heather@it'stwinsanity said...

Dayum! You make my cakes look lame.

twinmama said...

Great, great job, Helene! I am way impressed - cake decorating, having 2 sets of twins in 2 years, the whole thing! :)

LazyCrazyMama said...

OMG!! Those cakes are AWESOME!!!

Trippy Momma said...

I love the cakes... they turned out awesome... If you don't mind, could you either post the recipe you used for the fondant or email it to me... (deadlygypsy@yahoo.com) I have been looking for a recipe that is half way simple and I can do at home!

Oh also, do you happen to have a button for your blog? I looked around on here and didn't see one! You definitely have the best blog around! I would love to put your button on my own.

Thanks

Eva Gallant said...

What fabulous Cakes! Hell, you're not Betty Crocker, your Duncan Hines! lol

MommyAmy said...

Beautiful!! Coles cake turned out SO much better this time around! You should be seriously proud of yourself!

janice said...

Yay Helene! Your cakes turned out wonderfully! I DID like your trial run quite a lot though :)
What lucky kids!

Amy W said...

Sweet! (Couldn't help myself.) Mary is an awesome friend - you better keep her around. The cakes turned out fantastic!!

Bethany said...

Wow, those cakes are awesome!! Great job :)

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I figure that if the children are alive when my husband gets home at the end of the day, I've done my job.

----Roseanne Barr



 
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