Monday, November 30, 2009

10 signs that you and your hubby desperately need to get reacqainted...

I was looking through our wedding album a few days ago. In the pictures, Tim and I both look so overjoyed and radiant. This was one of the first kisses we shared as husband and wife (while my ovaries did a happy dance)....

Another kiss!

What happened to us?? Oh yeah, now I remember.....


While we are thrilled to be parents to these 4 awesome kids, our relationship has suffered somewhat....through all the sleepless nights, ER visits on a Sunday afternoon, and just the basic chaos and stress that is our everyday life.

Lately, it's occurred to me that Tim and I need to reconnect. Sometimes it feels more like we're old friends, rather than husband and wife. I miss the passion that we used to have....I miss the laughter. I really just miss the "old" us.

So how do you know when you and your husband desperately need to get reacquainted with one another? Read on....

1) You run into each other at the local Starbucks and when he sees you across the crowded room, he has a confused look on his face like, "Don't I know you from somewhere? You look really familiar".

2) You answer the phone and hear, "Hey honey, it's me..." and you cut him off with, "Uh, I think you have the wrong number..."

3) Trying to spice things up in the bedroom, you spritz your body with whipped cream. He takes one look at you and says, "Did you forget that I'm lactose intolerant?"

4) He often ends his sentences with "....I already told you why, Mom...I mean, sweetie"

5) Trying to be sexy, you e-mail him a picture of your boobs and when he comes home, he says, "You wouldn't believe the e-mail I got today!! Some chick sent me a picture of her boobs!" You roll your eyes and say, "You jerk, that was me...trying to be spontaneous and sexy" and he quietly responds, "Oh....why did I think your boobs were bigger than that?"

6) When filling out some medical paperwork, he asks you, "Are you 39 or 40 years old? I can't remember"

7) He leaves a "love note" in your purse and then acts disappointed that you've never mentioned it. You apologize and say, "I'm sorry but I haven't used that purse in ages". He says, "Since when don't you carry a purse?" and you reply, "Uh, since graduating to parenthood when the diaper bag replaced my purse".

8) While having a conversation one day, you notice he looks bewildered. You ask, "What??" and he says, "Have you always had dimples when you smile?"

9) When you run into an old friend at the store, you introduce him as your roommate.....by accident, of course.

10) You're not "friends" with one another on Facebook. Yet you're "friends" with all 3 of your childhood girlfriends whom you haven't seen in at least 25 years.

If this sounds like you and your spouse, it may be a good idea to schedule a date night....ASAP. I know I am....

Memorable conversation of the day:

Cole: (crying) Mommy, Bella jumped on me

Me: Bella, did you jump on him?

Bella: NO, he's lying. I only jumped on half of him.

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47 comments:

Alicia said...

Yes..those definitely are signs of needing to reconnect!!

So funny!!!

And I love the memorable conversation!! LOL!

Buckeroomama said...

LOL! I love your list!

So does she think she will get only half a time-out? Too cute the things that they come up with. :)

Yay on getting the big photo thing working!!

DysFUNctional Mom said...

Gorgeous wedding photo!
I'm thinking you and whoever-that-guy-is need a date night stat!
Love Bella's comment too. That kid cracks me up!

When did I become my Mom said...

I love #4 and your memorable conversation today. I might need to schedule a date too...

Veronica Lee said...

What a beautiful couple you both make. Love the pic!!

Yaya said...

Lol!

'did you always have dimples?'
Too funny!

Karen & Gerard Zemek said...

Funny but sad in a way isn't it? I know my husband and I take each other for granted usually now after 12 years of marriage. I do try to catch myself though and try to show him how much I love him.

Lee the Hot Flash Queen said...

I would laugh, but I always say that the hubby and I are buds that just hang out with monthly benefits!!

Kate Coveny Hood said...

How many of these are actually true...?

Great picture - you were a beautiful bride!

Mighty M said...

Ha! Great post - Are these true?? Especially the Starbucks one - that is funny! :)

Lolli said...

Sound slike something I could have written. Except I've never emailed my boobs. His response is priceless!

Morgan said...

The whip cream one is pretty funny. I'm wondering too- how many of these do you and your husband fit?

I hope you guys had a wonderful Thanksgiving Helene!

Samantha said...

It is so funny that you wrote this blog. Yesterday I was looking at an ornament of the Hubs and I on our first Christmas together. We looked so freakin' in love, that it's a wonder you couldn't see it pouring out of our eye balls. Not that I'm not in love with him anymore, but he doesn't look at me the way he did in that picture anymore & I don't look at him the same way. I'm so very blessed to have Bree, and she has brought a lot to our lives, but she has also brought a lot between the Hubs and I. The good news is that kids get older, and will eventually leave the house at which point you can start where you left off again. That's what I'm looking forward to :)

Sadia said...

Helene, you so tell it like it is. I e-mailed your post to my own husband. Of course, now it looks like we won't see each other until June, so that date will just have to wait. Pictures of boobs, on the other hand ... I just got measured yesterday and I guess I only LOOK smaller. :)

Beverly said...

Been there..now that ours is 7 years old it is much better.
It is great because we are the best of friends and I have my love back too!

Liz @ Sugarplum Creations said...

You said it! Children are such a blessing, but boy, can they take a toll on a marriage. The girls used to stay up until Jeremy and I were practically ready to go to bed. Now we get them to bed at a decent time, and can actually have a conversation every once in awhile. It's so great to reconnect!

Brooke said...

lol @ the roommate comment. although if my hubs was just a roommate and not providing other...um...benefits i would have kick his messy butt out a long time ago!

Kristina P. said...

Lactose intolerant. Ha!

Thena said...

So very true no matter how long you've been married or the ages of the kids. I've noticed with mine it's the small things. Just saying thank you and show that he's appreciated.

Just A Mom (Call me JAM for short) said...

Ahhh... the joys of parenthood. It's all good, as long as you can keep a sense of humor (which you seem to be doing!)

Stopping by from SITS to say hello!

Jessica Jones said...

yes we def. need a date night too!!!

The Mother said...

On the other hand---having a husband who's not busy and spends a large portion of his day at home has its downside, too.

Seriously.

Eva Gallant said...

What a lovely couple you make! And you're right...it's important to reconnect.

yonca said...

Lovely pic Helen!
Date night definitely works. Talking from experience :) hehe..

Missy (Two Little Monkeys) said...

I love the boob email one! Too funny & Helene, you honestly crack me up! I needed a good laugh today too (Crappy ol' sinus infection dragging me down!)
And what a beautiful wedding photo - you two make a beautiful couple!

Corrie Howe said...

I love the wedding photo too! And your kids remind me of mine...they want to play semantics with you.

Not only date night, but a weekend or longer alone! Farm out the kids if you have to!

Angela said...

Ok, I could write a book on this one. I had to leave the house last night to get some fresh air and while I was walking I kept thinking I'm half-a..ed at everthing right now! Especially to my older kiddos and hubby! So why is it I have to be the one to still make all the moves while he lays there showing NO interest, but the next day he'll complain about not getting any!!!!I just keep telling myself (esp. since we've been in this stage before) this will pass....Don't let my mind jump off the deep end...this is just a stage....ARGHHHH!

kys said...

I love your list. Not that I can relate to it.....,

Erin said...

Helene,

This is so ironic b/c today is our anniversary and I was looking at our wedding album last night! (go see my post for today if you haven't already). Your pic is beautiful and you are so right---we definitely do need to reconnect. It's so hard with kiddos, though!

shortmama said...

That list is hilarious! My fave is about the unknown boobs!

Jenna @ Newlyweds said...

How funny, loved the email the boobs pictures....

I know sometimes I feel like I talk to everyone else more than my own hubby, because when we are together we usually just talk about the kids or what needs to be done.

But one thing we have implemented if we do go out on a rare date, no work, kids or family talk, just us!

Glad you didn't lose me!! I am so happy I finally made the switch.

The Lane Family said...

I completely know what you are saying and can relate. I was looking at our engagement picture the other day and had to laugh because I thought...gosh who are those people :)!!!

We are working on the reconnecting and trying to go out at least once every couple of months of a formal night out.

By the way the conversation was hiliarious at the end and sounds like something Aidan would say!!

Frugal Vicki said...

Yeah....I figured we had to reconnect when I couldn't remember the last time we kissed. How bad is THAT! And I only have half of your kids!
Your story reminded me of my son. I heard my daughter scream...this is the conversation that followed
ME:what happened?
HIM: I pushed her in the tub
ME: You PUSHED her in the tub?
HIM: no
ME. Well, where is she?
HIM: In the tub........

Jen said...

After reading this, I too totally need a date night.

And I LOVED your email about your dream today. It totally cracked me up.

Mrsbear said...

Reconnecting sounds like work. I don't know that I'll ever be able to muster the same kind of enthusiasm I did 15 years ago before the four kids. My husband offered to buy me sexy panties for the holidays, I told him if he got my size wrong I'd divorce him, he's better off going with a gift card. If he didn't recognize my breasts, I'd have to beat him with a tire iron. ;)

HeartsMakeFamilies said...

WOw what a beautiful picture. I love this list.

Menopausal New Mom said...

Your Wedding Photo is GORGEOUS!! So beautiful! And yes, I can relate to your list but so far I haven't introduced my hubby as my roommate Lol!

Flory said...

Beautiful pictures! Your list had me laughing, especially with the photo of the boobs. :)

LOL - only jumped on half of him.

KK said...

I hope you get a date night soon!!

Mama to 3 boys said...

That is too funny! I know what you mean though!

LOVE the memorable conversation. It made my day HAHAHAH!

Thanks for following me now at xoxomamato3boysxoxo.blogspot.com!

Michelle said...

YES, I'm feeling like that these days.

Secret to long marriages...have lots of babies.. that first time, after giving birth, VERY romantic. LOL

LazyCrazyMama said...

haha!!! I love it!! I especially love the half jumping, kids learn so early!! ;)

Kim said...

Your wedding picture is gorgeous!

Number 4 . . . ouch!

Vera Ezimora said...

First time here. Must blog roll you.

Hahahahaha. Boy, this is too funny!!! I'm not married, but one of my dreams is to have a set of confusingly identical twin boys. *gulp*

I had a friend a few years ago whose mother had four sets of twins. Hmmph!

www.verastic.com

Jennifer said...

Oh yes, you and me both. We were guilty of #10 until just a month ago! LOL!

Paula @ Organizing Tips For Moms said...

You make me laugh! Thanks, I needed that.

prashant said...

And I love the memorable conversation

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I figure that if the children are alive when my husband gets home at the end of the day, I've done my job.

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