It's Lazy Sunday again! Here's an oldie, but goodie....
1) You're at the park and one of your kids asks a total stranger to help her on the monkey bars. When the stranger looks over at you and then says to your sweet child, "shouldn't you ask HER to help you?"..... your child says, "Oh, HER? That's just my mom".
2) While grocery shopping, your kids walk by the grapes and pop a couple in their mouth. When they notice the produce guy is watching them, one child shrugs and says, "My mom told me to do it".
3) One of their favorite forms of entertainment is throwing various objects up into the ceiling fan....and they actually high-5 each other when one of them manages to make a dent in the wall.
4) You hear, "Look at all that poop....GROSS"....and they're nowhere near the bathroom.
5) You threaten them with, "If you all don't stop throwing food on the floor, I'm gonna send you to your rooms"....and they stop long enough to look at one another and break out into hysterical laughter.....and then they go back to throwing food on the floor.
6) You respectfully get down to your child's level to speak with him and he plugs his nose and says, "Whew....you need to brush your teeth! It smells like someone farted in your mouth!"
7) Out of frustration, you tell your unruly kids, "Okay, that's it....I'm calling Supernanny".....and they scream "AWESOME!" and hand you the phone.
8) While out with friends, you brag to them about how well you've been doing on your diet....and then not 5 minutes later one of your kids says, "Mommy, are you gonna have ice cream for dinner again tonight?"
9) You hear giggling coming from your bathroom while one little voice is saying, "here, put these in there".....and you walk into the bathroom just in time to see them flushing an entire box of tampons down the toilet....
10) When the cashier at the grocery store asks you "so did you find everything okay today?" as she's ringing up your order, your daughter happily answers for you with, "Yep, we did. My mom knows exactly where you keep the wine and the beer. The wine is for her and the beer is for my dad. They drink it after we're in bed every night"....
...and all you can do is smile politely at the cashier and say, "Well, it COULD be worse....we COULD be drinking in the middle of the day while they're awake, right?"
You then make a mental note to yourself to remember to drive all the way across town to the other grocery store next time you need to replenish your wine and beer supply.....which just happens to be the next day.