Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Fleeting thoughts....

I sat down on the sofa tonight after the kids were in bed and the house was completely silent. Well, with the exception of the sound of Tim crunching on cheetos. Why is it that he can be upstairs in our bedroom with the door closed and I can be downstairs in the family room and I can STILL hearing him crunching on those damn cheetos?!

So yeah, the house was silent (sorta) and all sorts of thoughts were fleeting through my mind, such as:

1) I took the kids to Costco today. Yes, I have officially lost my mind...taking 4 kids to Costco on a busy Monday afternoon....right before Thanksgiving. Good times.

Actually, it wasn't really THAT bad. Except for when Landon started shrieking at the top of his lungs because I wouldn't let him out of the cart AGAIN. He would keep promising to stay next to me and then I'd turn around and he would be gone. See, there's the problem right there I suppose...I expected a 2-yr old to make a promise to me and actually keep it. I'm obviously the one with the problem here, not him.

I guess my veiled threat..."If you keep walking ahead of us, you're gonna get lost. And I'm not promising that I'll go looking for you"....wasn't actually as frightening as I thought.

As we waited in line, the kids were running circles around the cart. A woman and her mother were behind us and the woman said, "Oh, they are just precious. But you really have your hands full, don't you?" All I could do was smile and say, "You know, if I had a dollar for every time someone said that to me, I'd be able to hire a babysitter so I wouldn't have to drag them to Costco with me".

2) Why do my kids think they get a treat every time they do something that's expected of them? For instance, the other day Cole brought his plate to the sink after he was done eating. I said, "Thank you for remembering to bring me your plate". He said, "What do I get?" and I asked, "For what?" and he said, "For bringing my plate to you without you having to ask me".

Are you freakin serious, kid? I glared at him and said, "You get the satisfaction of knowing you made me happy...isn't that good enough?" He shrugged his shoulders and said, "Not really, that kind of sucks. I wanted a piece of candy or something".

3) My mom called out of the blue and offered to take Cole and Bella to the movies....in 2 weeks. I was like, "What's up with the 2 weeks thing? Why not this weekend?" and she said, "Uh, well, we have stuff to do this weekend".

Okay....this all sounds rather suspicious to me. To explain, my mom very rarely calls and when she does call, it's never really been to offer to take the kids anywhere. I told Tim about it and he instantly thought the same thing as me....oh, there are definitely strings attached to this offer. Is it worth me selling my soul to the devil just to have a 2-hr break from 2 of my kids?

4) What is it with men and tv? Last night, I asked Tim to grab a roll of paper towels out of the garage. As he walked to the door, he stopped in front of the tv and stood there like a freakin zombie...mouth open, eyes glazed over....you'd think there was a naked girl on the tv screen. I must have said to him at least 3 times, "Hey, were you gonna get me the paper towels....before I go into full-blown menopause??!!" He didn't hear a word I said.

How can he be THAT into a movie he hasn't even seen the beginning of? Doesn't he have to know the whole plot of the movie to enjoy the ending? Lastly, how come he's not that mesmerized when I'm telling how my day with the kids was? I kid, obviously.

5) We went to a friend's birthday party on Saturday, which was a lot of fun. Several times, both Garrett and Landon had tantrums where they would violently throw their bodies on the ground and shriek at the top of their lungs about how unfair life is.

A few people asked me, "What's wrong with them?" I answered, "Uh, they're 2 years old. That's what's wrong with them".

And that's pretty much where my fleeting thoughts ended....for today, anyway.

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44 comments:

DysFUNctional Mom said...

Hmm, I hope the offer from Mom doesn't really have strings attached.
Hey, I want to lay down on the floor and have a tantrum sometimes (daily) and I'm not even 2!

Buckeroomama said...

Despite knowing that 2-year olds cannot be expected to keep their promises (consistently), I always fall for the "I promise, Mommy" and then I get upset (at myself, mostly!) when Z won't do what she promised...

FRANNIE said...

I remember bringing the kids to our equivalent of Costco....there was always a food bribe involved to keep them occupied. Thus they didn't try and 'escape'. Good times, good times.

Yaya said...

That's so funny he said 'that sucks', lol!

I nanny for 4 kids and when we run errands I am so exhausted at the end of the day. But the nice thing for me is:
A) I'm getting paid
B) I get to leave them at the end of the day ;)

Karen & Gerard Zemek said...

Will be interesting if Cole brings his plate over to you anymore without asking. That's pretty scary that a kid expects something every time he does something. Can't believe he wasn't happy about just making you happy--that's very sad.

Lee the Hot Flash Queen said...

I only have 2 and they act just like your four. I want to know what is up with the getting something for doing something they should as well. Become my slave, I'll give you some candy. Put your plate in the sink and I'll pat your head cuz you were good!

yonca said...

I liked you said 'they're 2 years old. That's what's wrong with them'
It is funny when Cole asked "What do i get" hehe..My son want me to thank to him after he picked up his toys on the floor in livingroom:) and says"can i get another chocolate now? :)"
Have a great holiday week Helen!

Amy said...

I say yeah for two year olds. I mean I have one now for almost a month. I mean she woke up on her Birthday of turning two and she was a whole different person. I love the "No Mama" The faces and pushes and cries. Fun times. Your husband is so much like mine. He goes and gets a snack in the middle of the night and lays down and crunches. I do not know what is about men and t.v. either.

Twins Squared said...

Ahh the life of a mom! On #3, funny - mine do the same thing. Kaitlyn made a chart last week and when she does something good she gets a check and then when she fills up her row she gets a prize. This was all her idea. And so now she tells me some little thing, like she was nice to her sister, and asks for her check. What? No way! Oh, and it also sounds like my husband - he does something good around the house for me and also wants a "treat."

#7 - love your answer! About 2 months ago I was telling my mom how tired I was and she said "Well, honey, why are you so tired?" Are you kidding me? I was like, "uh, because I have 4 kids age 5 and under?" You mean the answer is not obvious!

Love reading your blog. I think if we lived near each other we'd be good friends!

The Mother said...

My MIL lives five blocks from us. She's so busy with her tennis and her art that she rarely takes the kids. Better, now, that they're, like, grown up and I don't need her.

My mom would love to take the kids off my hands, but she lives 300 miles away.

I have, in desperation, shipped one or two up to her.

That's life, as they say.

Eva Gallant said...

Does that mean tantrums are just for kids, and I'm not suposed to be having any??

Samantha said...

Your hubby sounds like mine. When he eats, I feel like I'm sitting next to horse eating. It is so loud! And the t.v thing...exactly like my Hubs. He will stand in one spot, and just stare at the tv when he's supposed to be doing something for me. Sometimes I have the urge to just throw something at his head.

Oh and tantrums. Those are just such fun. Bree has full blown breakdowns whenever we exit the toy aisle of a store and she didn't get anything. It sounds like I have just stabbed her in the gut, and everyone in the store is looking at her and then me and then back at her again. I wish I could know what they were thinking, then maybe they'd know what I was thinking.

kristi said...

I never tell people they must have their hands full...didn't know how often people hear it til' I started blogging and reading blogs.

Are we married to the same man?
My hubby's chewing drives me insane. He clacks his teeth together, it is WEIRD. And then he sloshes his tea around his mouth to "get the food out of his teeth." WTH?

TC , every day when I come home from work looks in my lunch sack and says, "What did you buy me?"
SERIOUSLY like he gets a new toy daily!

Kristina P. said...

I wish I got a treat everytime I did something good.

Donna said...

Ack - how did MY husband end up in YOUR living room!! lol I swear when he zones out on TV, I could go running through the living room butt naked and he wouldn't notice - well maybe if I had a beer in my hand...

Costco with 4 - you brave. Very brave woman! Thanks for the laughs again!

Michelle said...

That's some good stuff.

and lest you think you are all alone...

my husband is the loudest chewer in the world.

even when my kids are being perfect angels and helping like crazy at the store, someone enevitably says...you got your hands full, don't you?

and i think...not so much...they are helping me. But i never have a wise comeback like you did.

Megan said...

SO tell me. Are you teaching your children to count? Um, well you may want to remember that the number 2 goes between 1 and 3. Just saying. that really shows how crazy you are.


I think their brain cells just shut off when they pass by the tv. Seriously. Sometimes i have to actually turn the tv off to get my boys attention!

Quasi Serendipita said...

I am really curious about what your mother is up to! Hopefully you will post an update ;)

Lani said...

As far as number 4 goes.. it's a part of the "man tactics".. pretend they don't hear you.. act like they can't do something right, or do it really slowly so that you will just do it yourself... pretend to be asleep when the kids get up so you have to get up(ok maybe I have tried that one once or twice but it never works for me)
My husband has some serious man tactics as you can tell:)

Brooke said...

i'm interested to see what your mom has up her sleeve. i mean now that you've shared this much with us, you'll have to follow through!

Karen said...

I THOUGHT those were your kids I was trying to navigate around at the Costco yesterday! hahaha

The Lane Family said...

Oh My gosh so many good things in the post!!

I love the Costco issue and the idea that if you got paid everytime you heard...you hands are full how rich you would be.

I also love your husband just standing there looking at the T.v and acting like you are speaking to the wall. My husband does the same thing regardless of where we are at in the movie or what it is we are watching....male thing.

My favorite of all was "because they are 2 year old's that is why!!

By the way love the new pictures on the sides!!

Alicia said...

Oh my gosh, you're too much!!!!!!!! You have me cracking up all the time!

Nezzy said...

Laughing like crazy here, their two. So true.

You and your precious fam have a great Thanksgiving!!!

shortmama said...

My husband does that same freakin thing with the TV and it makes me CRAZY....ER Crazier

Pam said...

My husband does the exact same thing with the TV. When are kids were little I'd catch me entrance by Teletubbies. Teletubbies!!! WTF?

blueviolet said...

You let him crunch on cheetos in your bedroom? My husband would be DEAD!

Cole's response to your compliment cracked me up!!!

Semi-Slacker Mom said...

Baby Girl has started offering me Pinky promises. Someone must have put something in both of our drinks this week.

Michelle said...

Oh my!

1) I took my 3 kids to Costco with me today but I took my hubby too. I also only had to buy 3 things and stop at the snack bar. Mainly I needed to pick up my Christmas cards before my $5 off coupon expired.

2) My kids used to be that way but they are starting to get over it.

3) I don't know a lot of the back story about your mom but I hope it does not have any strings attached. It is probably still worth it!

4) It is not just men but 9 year old daughter does it all the time. I call them TV zombies when they act that way.

5) "They're two years old. That's what's wrong with them." I love it! Whoever said that must not have kids!

KK said...

Wow, you so deserve a break today :) I don't understand the power of the TV either, but it is like a magnet that zeros in on men!

Jenny said...

My daughter is the same way about wanting a treat when she does something she's supposed to. I don't get it.

She also wants to buy something every time we go to the store. I have never been like that with her, so I'm not sure why she thinks she can. I guess in her mind it doesn't hurt to ask. LOL!

BoufMom9 said...

LOL! I think I'm going to remember that first comment! That's a goodie!

I about chocked on my Pepsi when i read what Cole said about his dishes. Wouldn't it be eutopia if kids just did things because it made us happy? Ahhh, that would be the life!

M said...

My husband is a little more upscale ... he ignores me with the newspaper :) ...

My mom comes to stay with us and casually mentions (several hundred times) that I need more rugs and curtains because my house is so loud ... uhhhh ... no mom ... it's the kids.

And Costco ... I take all mine ... we eat our way through the store then I give them suckers while we stand in line for check out ... I actually found suckers that are loaded with vitamins ... ha ha ha ... who's the sucker now kids???

:) Have a good Thanksgiving.

Menopausal New Mom said...

Oh, you do have your hands full! And speaking of zombie, that's exactly how my hubby is when sports are on TV. I could walk by naked and he wouldn't see me! Listen to me? Nope I have to practically wave a hand in front of his face.

The thought of taking 4 little ones to Cosco during any day of the week is giving me a headache.

Gotta go find my tylenol! Thanks for sharing!

Creative Junkie said...

About the shopping thing ... I'm at the point where I don't want to take my youngest shopping with me anymore. She's 9 and all I hear throughout the entire car ride and every aisle of the store is "can I get this?" about a zillion times.

And about the Cheetos thing? My husband does the same thing with potato chips. WTH? I need to soundproof his mouth.

Kimberly@PrettyPinkMomma said...

You are a brave woman going to Costco all by yourself with 4 kids! I only have three and I won't go near the place unless I have reinforcements. Its so embarrassing as it is when my hubs comes anyways. The older ones are always running up and down the aisles, hiding in between crates of stuff, and pretending like they are on the set of Star Wars the Clone Wars. I am so the mom that just looks lost and helpless when I take all three of them anywhere. No wonder I'm a frickin' hermit!

Corrie Howe said...

Yep! A seriously frightening threat only works once, especially if they discover you aren't going to follow through. I'm so lucky now that a have a teenager at home to leave the kids with when I shop. Sometimes I even pay him.

wife.mom.nurse said...

I always like it when u r random ;)

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving friend!

~Julie

kys said...

Your mom doesn't help you out with the kids? I don't feel so bad about not having anyone around us now.

Have a great Thanksgiving!

Queenie Jeannie said...

Yep, I've felt/experienced a lot of this "fun stuff", lol! Good news? You survive it and have lots of cool war stories to share!!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Tiffany said...

I hear the hubs clearing his sinuses from anywhere in the house - drives me nuts.

And the questions from the lady at the birthday party? What are people thinking?? I have a 2 year old myself, tantrums come w/ the kid.

Kacey R. said...

The "hands full" comment I am SO OVER! LOL And I really do not know what the deal is with men & crunching but I think I've scared my husband into avoiding those foods unless he's in the garage. ;D

Holly at Tropic of Mom said...

Two years old. That's all a mom needs to say to another mom. :)

You deserve a badge for taking four small children to Costco. And getting any shopping actually done.

Frugal Vicki said...

See, you make those of us that take two to Walmart and grab their heads in frustration seem like wimps. Plus I want to know why the simple mention of cheetos makes me want to run to the store

I figure that if the children are alive when my husband gets home at the end of the day, I've done my job.

----Roseanne Barr



 
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