I owe Tim big time. And not just because he let me post a picture of him with a black-and-blue eye he received while catching a soccer ball with his face.
I don't say it often enough but Tim goes above and beyond when it comes to helping me with the kids.
Sure, he runs off to work every Monday through Friday with a little skip in his step, as he anticipates where he may eat lunch that day or just being able to listen to Rush Limbaugh on his car stereo in peace and quiet as he sits in rush hour traffic.
But when he comes home, literally from the minute he pulls up in the driveway, I do the hand off..."Yeah, Daddy's home! Mommy's off the clock!"
Some dads need a cool-down period when they get home from work but Tim knows that even if he demanded it, the kids wouldn't give it to him.
He welcomes them with open arms, greeting them at the door with "Hey guys, I see you managed to keep your mother from checking herself into the psych ward today...high 5's for everyone!"
After dinner, on most nights, he'll rush them upstairs to give them a bath so I can either wash the dishes without 8 little hands clawing at me or sit down at the table and zone out on my laptop.
So with Father's Day in mind, I feel like I need to pull out all the stops and really let him know how much he's appreciated around here.
After him spending the day lounging around on the sofa, we'll have a nice, romantic dinner (well, as romantic as it can get with 4 rugrats under foot)...a big heaping bowl of buttery Pasta Boobs...what man wouldn't love to eat sexy noodles for dinner?
And, of course, there will be no veggies in sight because it is all about Tim, after all, and he's apparently allergic to all things green, orange and yellow.
Then we'll get to the presents, the best part of the holiday...
Every Father's year, I buy him various t-shirts because the 25 he already has just don't seem like enough. Usually I buy him a couple funny shirts, with my personal favorite thus far being "You can't scare me, I have two sets of twins".
This year, I'm thinking of a t-shirt that says "Who are these kids and why are they calling me Dad?" or "Some people are only alive because it's illegal to kill them".
And, of course, because he's a soccer lover, a few FIFA t-shirts are almost a given.
Since I'm all about useful gifts, I'll have to include a package of crossword puzzle toilet paper. But then again, maybe not...I don't need to give him any excuses to spend even more time in the bathroom than he already does.
Maybe a potty night light would be more appropriate...but that might be considered more of a "to you, for me" present since I'm the one who gets stuck cleaning up all the pee behind the toilet, courtesy of the males in this house who have poor aim.
The kids want to make a craft for him, probably something that incorporates their hand prints because that always seems to bring out Tim's sentimental side.
Originally, they wanted to make him one of those "Our Dad rocks" paper weights but I can easily see that becoming one of their weapons of choice.
Now that I think about it, he'd probably just prefer to have the t-shirts, the pasta boobs and the house to himself for the entire day.
Can't say I blame him...
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