Monday, August 16, 2010

It must be a male thing....

I'm knee-deep in making a birthday video for Cole and Bella's upcoming birthday, as well as shopping for school supplies.

So, to make life a little less stressful, I've decided to just repost this "oldie but goodie" from a year ago.

Enjoy!

It must be a male thing...

I'll give you two hints in the form of pictures:





Have you figured it out yet?

It's pretty obvious that Garrett is looking at the ads from the Sunday paper from last weekend. But what may not be as obvious is that he's.....uh.....well.....there's no proper way to put it, I suppose....he's pooping in his diaper.

Yes, my friends, he is a typical male. He must have something to read while he poops. I didn't realize this "I must have something to read while I poop" thing started so early. I mean, he's only 2.5 years old.

Maybe it's even a generational thing....my grandfather did it, my father did it and Tim does it.

Which leads me to my next issue....why do men get the privilege of "relaxing" in the bathroom long enough to read the paper or a magazine?

I can't even remember the last time I had even 10 seconds to myself in the bathroom. Yet, men get to lock themselves away in the bathroom for what seems like an eternity, while they catch up on the latest going on in the world....

And oh, yes, let's not forget they also get to take care of bodily functions at the same time. Killing two birds at once, I suppose. I guess it's a productive use of time, when you look at it that way. Still, it doesn't make me any less resentful.

The other day Tim came out of the bathroom and asked me, "Did you hear that Bernie Madoff has pancreatic cancer?" I looked up at him from what I was doing (the dishes, of course) and said, "Who? What?" and he repeated himself again.

I laughed and said, "I'm sorry, you must have me confused with someone who actually gets to read the paper and watch the news OR someone who is afforded the LUXURY of being in the bathroom taking care of bodily functions WHILE reading the paper....but I can tell you that the new show on PBS, The Dinosaur Train, starts tomorrow and that there's a new flavor of V-8 Fusion on the market...that's the lastest news in MY world".

He just stared at me for a few seconds and then he said, "Oh, I didn't realize we live in two different worlds".

I said, "Oh, we do.....trust me, we do. In fact, we probably live in two completely different universes".

And, he walked away. I'll give him one thing....he's definitely smart enough to know now that a conversation like this could never possibly end on a good note.

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25 comments:

Marcia (123 blog) said...

Will we get to see it???

Also, what are you doing to celebrate their party?

And while I'm asking questions, when do twins start wanting separate parties? Hmm

Rebecca said...

Wonderful! Husband takes his laptop into the bathroom...WTF? I want to bash it over his head whenever I see him heading that way!

Shell said...

Smart man to walk away.

I never get why men are in the bathroom for like an hour. My house probably wouldn't be standing when I came out if I tried that.

BigSis said...

Sometimes I go into the bathroom just to hide...

The Mother said...

Male brains are simply wired differently. We mere females will never completely understand.

Evonne said...

I honestly can't remember the last time I was in the bathroom by myself.

Men definitely don't understand our world, but I wish I had some of the luxuries of their world, like peeing in peace!

Crossed Fingers said...

haha - I agree - what is with the reading and the pooping and the going for hours?

shortmama said...

Yeah men suck

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

One day, you may surprise them all and lock the bathroom door and take a magazine right along with you. When the banging and looking under the door starts, you can just sing loudly and eventually, they'll get the hint (maybe) and wait until you've read the whole magazine.

McKenzie said...

I think I get a whole 5 seconds to myself in the bathroom.. Haha!

MiMi said...

That is hilarious!!

ModernMom said...

It really is a man thing:)

beemii said...

Hi...larious. Like Father, Like Son I guess. Thanks for posting again

http://mommyhood2003.blogspot.com

Nezzy said...

Yep sister, it's gotta be a male thing!

Have a marvelous Monday and may God bless it!!! :o)

Ginny Marie said...

I often wondered the same thing...my husband has a stack of reading material in "his" bathroom, too! And heaven help us if we disturb his time in there (Yes, he locks the door, too!) I've got little kids barging in on me all the time!

Jenny said...

LOL about the reading and pooping. I'm not sure why someone would even need to read when they poop? LOL!

Eva Gallant said...

Funny but true!

blueviolet said...

I hate the poopy readers; no friends of mine!

purseblogger said...

I didn't know that Bernie Madoff has cancer either. I so hear you on the different worlds we live in. I go in the bathroom and two seconds later there's knocking and MOOOMMM!!!

KK said...

Too funny. Oh to be a man.

Momlissa said...

My husband quite regularly disappears for about 45 minutes in the morning. VERY irritating! I am in and out in under 3 minutes. Seriously, us moms don't have the luxury of whatever it is he's doing in there. lol. Most of the time, I am trying to take care of business before someone inevitably starts banging on the door! To be a man, indeed!

Annie said...

Too funny!!!!

MamaOnDaGo said...

I've learned that I can have a nanosecond of alone time in the bathroom if I drop off the 1 year old in the farthest corner of our house and run like the wind to the bathroom. By the time he gets to the bathroom, I've already done my business. The problem is he's getting faster and I'm not.

Meathead said...

Ewwwww!!
I can hardly handle the idea of tooth brushes being in the bathroom, let alone reading material that may end up in another part of the house. I mean... wouldn't there be poo particles on it from the air? Ewwwww!!

When did I become my Mom said...

PREACH IT SISTER! Man I can't even remember what it was like to be able to go to the bathroom without little feet following me or the door being flung open to announce something... "Major".



who am I kidding. who bothers to close the door anymore. sigh.

I figure that if the children are alive when my husband gets home at the end of the day, I've done my job.

----Roseanne Barr



 
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