Wednesday, September 19, 2012

In need of a good laugh? Well, you've come to the right place....

I've got 3 words for you....Facebook Status Updates.

Need I say more??


Just now, Landon demanded that Garrett go upstairs and get him his pillow.

Garrett:  Uh, dude...unless you just deposited a check into my account, I don't work for you.  Get it yourself.

Landon:  (marches upstairs to get his own pillow)

Garrett:  Hey Mommy, I just said to Landon what you always say to us and it worked!

Not sure if I should be proud of this moment or not but I simply can't help beaming with pride right now.

=======================================================

Mom Fail #3,102..... 

I told Garrett and Landon this morning that I would have their heads on plates if they woke Cole up this morning. 

So then, I go to the let the cats outside and....bam.....set off the burglar alarm. 

Cole comes downstairs all sleepy-eyed and says, "The alarm woke me up." 

Garrett says, "Good going, Mommy". 

============================================================

I just had the following conversation with Bella: 

Bella - Mommy, what does IDK stand for?
Me: I don't know 
Bella: No, IDK!! 
Me: I don't know!
Bella: No, what does it stand for?
Me: I'm telling you, I don't know!
Bella: How come you know what LOL stands for but IDK?
Me: I do, it's I don't know.
Bella: No, you just said you don't know. 
Me: For the love of God!! I - DON'T - KNOW. That's what IDK stands for...I don't know. 
Bella: Gosh, you don't have to get all mad about it. 

 I'm so glad God blessed me with a sense of humor because it's moments like this one that makes me want to pierce my eardrums with a toothpick.

 ===========================================================

This is what Garrett said to me today: 

"Mommy, it was fun when I was in your belly for those 17 years but, next time, I think I want to be in Daddy's belly because he eats junk food and drinks soda." 

Pregnant for 17 years? In Daddy's belly next time? 

What planet is this kid from? 

 ===========================================================

OMG!!! 

Bella just asked me, "Mommy, back in the olden days, when you were alive, was there a such thing as color?" 

Seriously, how old does she think I am?! 

(this status prompted one of the funniest comments from Karen..."Sounds like she doesn't think you're old. She thinks you're dead.")


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21 comments:

Jenny said...

LOL, especially about the last one. We were working on school work today and it was about almanacs. The text said, "where can you find information about the hottest day on record in the U.S.?" Abby said, "Google it!" LOLOL!

I then had to explain what an almanac was.

Marcia (123 blog) said...

I love Jenny's comment :)

And yes, your kids are priceless - I'm sure they think we are all OLD once we hit 20 or something :)

Olusola said...

I was already cracking up at the thought of being 17 years pregnant with twins, then I read Bella's comment :). Have fun mama

Christine said...

My boys are still wondering how my husband survived with only a stick and a rock to play with and a field to play in and how I could POSSIBLY enjoy reading quietly, even when I was young like them. Little turds have no idea!

They think we lived in the dark ages because there were no game consoles (well except for Atari and we didn't have one of those either).

Eva Gallant said...

Your kids are hysterical! I love it!

Rhiannon said...

oh gosh i totally needed that right now! totally!
I wish I lived in your house or even a fly on the wall... my son says things that make me do a double take but your kids are CLASSIC!!!

Catie said...

Haha! This totally cracked me up! They are too funny, especially that one!

angel shrout said...

Bwhahahah umm let me just say it does not necessarily get better as you get older.

Heather Mott said...

Oh Helene..If I ever need a chuckle or a laugh I sure know where to go. You are such a great writer and on my bad days I just stroll over and check you out. I hope you are doing well..My life is really tough right now with the trips at 3 years old..Yuck

Heather Mott

Natalie said...

This totally just made me smile!

Jode said...

Oh you crack me up Helene....or your kids do i guess!!
Thanks for sharing, needed a laugh today after a morning of twin toddler tantrums...and still to early for a wine!
My teen topped it off by asking if we had phones when i was a kid....hmmmm old indeed!

Lisa said...

Hilarious!! I had the same thoughts as your friend Karen ;)

If you need another good laugh, check out my latest post about one of the most embarrassing times of my life: http://floatingalongblog.blogspot.com/2012/09/kusadasi-turkey.html

Barbara said...

I laughed through the whole thing, but I just about died when I read Jenny's comment!

Jen said...

Ah, the joys of the things kids say.

Kimberly said...

OMG...I love your family.
I need to stalk you on facebook

IASoupMama said...

I love it!! And I'm so glad that your amazing kids inherited your awesome sense of humor!

Twins Squared said...

Yes, all very funny! I know - I put my kids comments on Facebook too - and about every 2 months I go and cut and paste ALL my comments into a word document. It's like that alone makes its own journal. They need an easy way to do that on FB. Hope you're doing well Helene!

championm2000 said...

IDK...LMAO!

MiMi said...

The IDK convo reminds me of the same sorta convo I had with my mom about the UPS truck. What's UPS mom? (pronouncing it as a word.) U-P-S.
No. I know it's U-P-S but what does UPS mean?

Belkowski Gaylord said...

Thanks for sharing, need a laugh after this morning's double toddler child temper... And at the beginning of a wine!
My youth more than it will ask if we have a mobile phone, when I was a child... Well old indeed!



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I figure that if the children are alive when my husband gets home at the end of the day, I've done my job.

----Roseanne Barr



 
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